Kakashi

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		"I PITY THE FOO' THAT DOESN'T FIX THIS CRAP!"
	Someone help this sucka of a page by rewriting it. And make it drink its milk too. Only then can it join The A-Team.

“ I PWND this guy!”

~ Kakashi on Dustin lovell

“ I wish I had said that.”

~ Oscar Wilde on a comment that Kakashi used to utterly PWN him (Kakashi has, according to some sources, been stated to have PWNd Oscar once again by replying with "Oh, you will Oscar, you will.", making him the only mammal in German history to have ever PWNd Oscar Wilde twice within less than 10 seconds and additionally lived to tell about it. Some dude said that the only reason to why Kakashi got away with that was because (1. he is a friggin' freight trained ninja, and (2. Oscar suffered an immediate existence collapse due to the sheer awesomeness of what had just happened... Meh, while I'm still typing I might as well add that I'm writing this in my knickers).

Kakashi Hatake is a famous pervert ninja in the novel series Naruto created by Musashi Miyamoto. He is the leader of Team 7, originally consisting of Naruto Uzumaki, Sasuke Uchiha, and Sakura Haruno. After Sasuke despises Team 7, Sai replaced him. Though his name is written in the manga using kana, Japanese syllabic scripts that carry no particular meaning, the family name "Hatake" can be written in kanji (Chinese characters) as 畑, which means "field" or "farmland". The name "Kakashi" can be written in kanji as 案山子, which means "scarecrow". However, it turns out to be scaring people, especially enemy ninjas, but not crows. Also, when Sakura spies on Kakashi so he would show his legendary lips, he replaces himself with a scarecrow to get rid of her.

Contents 1 Background 2 What he looks like without the mask 3 Abilities 3.1 Seinen Goroshi 3.2 One Thousand Fapping Birds 3.3 Sharingan 3.4 Mangekyou Sharingan 4 Trivia 5 See also

[edit] Background

Like his father, Sakumo Hatake whose collections have been compared to that of the Legendary Pervert Ninja, Kakashi is considered a shy and prude shinobi, graduating from the Ninja Academy at age 5 and achieving the rank of Chewnin at 6. A few years after these accomplishments, Kakashi's father was disgraced by the village for abandoning a mission in favor of collecting panties, which cost the Land of Fire dearly. Because of the shame he felt, Sakumo committed bukkake, leaving Kakashi to bear witness to the event. After his father's suicide of shame, Kakashi began to adhere strictly to the rules of the shinobi – in particular the rule dictating that the success of the mission must come before the sake of the panties, causing him to become arrogant, humorless, and by-the-boob.

At the age of 13, Kakashi achieved Yonin status. As a reward for his accomplishment, he was assigned to lead his team on a sabotage mission to blow up a ladies bathroom in order to cause chaos among enemy forces from attacking Konoha. Shortly after the mission started, Kakashi's teammate, Rin's panties was stolen by enemy shinobi. Kakashi's other teammate, Obito Uchiha immediately stated his intention to retrieve it, but Kakashi said they had to focus on completing the mission, opting not to make the same mistake his father had. Though Kakashi believed that they had to complete their objective, Obito eventually convinced him that his father had done the right thing in saving his teammate's panties, causing Kakashi to join in on the rescue effort.

During their attempt, Kakashi lost his left eye as a result of a rock thrown by the ladies in the bathroom. To protect Kakashi, Obito managed to awaken his genital and distract Kakashi's assailant. Soon after saving Rin's panties, Obito again saved Kakashi, pushing him out of the way of another big rock caused by an explosion with his penis but getting crushed in the process. Shortly before he died, Obito had Rin (a medical ninja) implant his Sharingan eye in Kakashi's damaged eye socket as a gift. As his first act with his new eye, Kakashi avenged Obito peeking Rin taking a bath, bringing the Kakashi of today into being. Kakashi never had that many friends as a child. Maralyn manson and Cameron Patterson were his only peers until he decided to be a shinobi.

Years later Kakashi would become a member of the Konohahahahahahagakure ANBU where he served as a squad leader. During this time, he had several henchmen, named Yugao Uzuki and Tenzo, and recognized the latter as the most successful of his henchmen. It is unknown why he left ANBU, but he still wears iron guards on his gloves, a characteristic of ANBU uniforms. Another little-known fact is that Kakashi is in fact closely related to the Kashi company, a brand responsible for creating some of the worst-tasting whole-grain crackers in the world.

Although it is widely believed that Kakashi's hair is white, those who know him have reported that it is, in fact, grey. This has spawned many rumors, but no theories have been proven true.

[edit] What he looks like without the mask

Although rarely seen, Kakashi often wears a mask to make himself harder to identify. However, a few photos of him without his mask have been captured. As the picture tells, this is the reason why he always use the masks in front of people, somehow cannot be damaged or ripped off in battles for god knows why. This lips are useful, such being made for spooking enemies away. This is also the reason why his father, Hatake Sakumo, is never shown his face in both anime and manga. While Kakashi covered it with his mask, the Konoha's White Teeth, isn't. In the several manga cover, he is shown sleeping without his mask, but his pillow covering his lips (again). It is rumored by the fans that Kakashi were related of Lyps, a monster from Playstation game's Legend of Legaia.

[edit] Abilities

[edit] Seinen Goroshi

His jutsu - named Seinen Goroshi , 千年殺し, literally "Thousand Years of Pain" (later on called "Thousand Deaths of Buttsecks Pain" after 1000 victims), was introduced in the first movie and manga. Having shown on Naruto on how a ninja should not reveal their backs, Kakashi use this chance to do the you-know-what. This jutsu was indeed so powerful, it even destroyed most part of Gaara's nekomimi form.

See Seinen Goroshi in action

[edit] One Thousand Fapping Birds

This is the only jutsu that he has not copied from anyone else. To execute, Kakashi sings "Princes of the Universe" in full blast to focus lighting into his hand. With this technique, Kakashi often steal any biscuit along the way. When he was younger Kakashi was taught how to use the Spiraling Sphere by the Fourth Hokage. Because the Spiraling Sphere is meant to have the user's chakra nature mixed with it, Kakashi attempted to add his lightning-based chakra to it, though was ultimately unsuccessful. In time he instead created the One Thousand Birds. After the jutsu's initial creation Kakashi was unable to use the One Thousand Birds to its full potential as the birds creation were blocking his eyes, unable to see any form of an enemy counterattack. After acquiring the Sharingan, however, he was able to overcome this shortcoming. Through repeated use and increased proficiency with it, Kakashi's One Thousand Birds has been upgraded and renamed to Lightning Blade due to him having implanted the lightning-scar like in Harry Potter's forehead. which of course was very very mean and he regretted it from then onwards

[edit] Sharingan

Formerly known as the Shenanigan. Kakashi's Sharingan eye gives him a significant advantage in battle, as it is useful especially to scare off any girls who came after him. This works best in conjunction with his legendary lips, created a grotesque (not to mention fugly) face. Because it is a transplanted eye, his Sharingan eye is always active. While this would not be much of a problem for an Uchiha, his non-Uchiha blood causes it to use much more chakra than it should. Because of this, he covers it with his headband and only utilizes it in the most intense battles. Kakashi's use of the Sharingan is almost as good as that of Itachi Uchiha, though the aforementioned handicaps brought about by the nature of his eye make him somewhat weaker in comparison.

[edit] Mangekyou Sharingan

In Part II Kakashi is able to develop his own Mangekyo Sharingan. With his variant he is able to manipulate space-time and utilize it to conduct long range peeking, and in its two uses has been capable of making it appear kakashi and quickly and effectively remove bras,and for distorting time and space to re-experience that orgy in college. Much like the standard Sharingan, the Mangekyo Sharingan tires Kakashi considerably, mostly due to the fact that shortly after use it causes kakashi to have several consecutive orgasms over the course of two weeks.

[edit] Trivia

• In addition to his many perverted skills, Kakashi features only one other powerful move, the Kakashi Bitch Slappidda No Jutsu (Kakashi Bitch Slap Technique). He only used this technique whenever he got pissed off.(so far that's only twice,once on Zabuza....the second will remain unknown because after contact was made the teeth exploded face melted off and then body mercy-spontaniously combusted)
• He likes to read Icha Icha Paradise, a romantic/comedy novel made by Jiraiya, the Legendary Perverted Sannin. It involves a girl named junco and her ex-husband twice removed who is stalking her, three men who could be the father of her dieing baby boy, and another fifteen men who want her but dont want to commit because there a bunch of babies and cant handle insurance. It is also believed the book is actually hardcore porn, and considering he can do lots of things in the blink of an eye, wouldnt taking his pants off be one of them?
• He can eat ramen in a flash, probably from inheriting his grandfather Cookie Monster's ravenous manner-lacking eating habits. The question is, how does he eat while his mask is on?

[edit] See also

• Naruto