Kim Il-sung
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“Glorious Banner of Songun, Eternal Sun, Mountain of our Hope, Founder of Worker's Beautiful Paradise, Forever Carrier of Power of Juche”
~ Kim Il-Sung on Himself
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| Term of office: | 1946 – 1994 | |
| Preceded by: | Kim Yoo Suk | |
| Succeeded by: | Kim Jong Il | |
| Date of birth: | April 16, 1912 | |
| Place of birth: | In a van down by the river, Pyongyang | |
| First Lady: | n/a | |
| Political party: | Communist | |
The Democratic People's Republic of Korea was founded by the invincible ever-victorious Great Leader President Marshal Kim Il Sung. Son of the great Korean communist theorist Kim Yoo Suk and Li'l Kim,
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[edit] Early years
The fruitful victorious conclusion of the Liberation of Korea from the hated Japanese bellicose aggressive oppressors of aggressively oppressive bellicosity was overseen by the Great Generilissimosiveness Kim Il Sung and world progressives remember to pay tribute and glorify the immortal revolutionary leadership exploits of Great Leader Comrade Generalissimo (and Great Generalissimo Comrade Leader) Kim Il Sung the Eternal President of the DPRK, Father of Socialist Korea and Immortal Sun of Juche.
[edit] Korean War
Comrade Kim Il Sung was the ever victorious steel willed brilliant commander and gifted military strategist who defeated 1.5 imperialisms in one generation, accomplished by heedlessly chucking millions of Russian and Chinese soldiers at his enemies.
[edit] Leader of North Korea
While the evil capitalist pig/dogs see our Great Lider as the founder of North Korea and it's great ideals, the credit of his work should be given where credit is due! Minime has influenced most of Kim Il Sung's achievements. (in my opinion, our country would be better off if it were'nt for minime hanging at the back of his ne....<shot to death by his friend>).
[edit] Death
President Kim Il Sung will always live in the hearts of the people. ALWAYS!!. He died of a heart attack after his minime in the back of his neck, had a heated argument with his son Kim Jong Il when Kim said he wanted to cut it off with a korean sickle. Still minime still lives on in the back of our Eternal President's neck.
[edit] Family life
After his death, his genius poofy-haired son Kim Jong-Il became the leader of the great (North) Korean people. Kim Jong-Il inherited the genius and lofty moral standing (and funky glasses) of his father President Kim Il Sung and his mother anti-japanese War Hero Kim Jong Seok. A true great man of body and mind confused the hawkish American military by faking the great famine of the 1990s by purposely starving millions of his peons.
[edit] Outsider Perception of Kim Il Sung
People of the outside world live in complete darkness (Electricity? Bah! The strong steel-willed glorious happy shiny people of North Korea don't need these Western extravagances!). The media is under the control of the Austrialian Jew Rupert Murdoch, working as a front for furthering the criminal designs of the so-called Bush "White" House of "fascist" "oppression." Thus people are brainwashed into believing the most blatantly false lies, like DPRK being unfree or that Kim Il Sung was a terrible tap dancer.
How blessed have the (North) Korean people been? Ah you outsiders shall never understand! You look at the weak-minded people of South Korea, and their freely elected leaders, democratic principles, and amazing technological achievements, and think of them as better than the North. Yet the North is all-powerful, doing away with such Western corruptive ideals like freedom of the press, the right to self-government, and running water.
"The Great Leader Comrade Kim Il Sung Is Immortal! (yet we're a bunch of godless commies who supposedly don't believe in God yet revere Glorious Leader Comrade Kim Il Sung as one!)"
[edit] Legacy of Minime (the cancerous growth)
Indeed Kim Il-sung left a great legacy on this earth, but mysteries abound if he really was Kim il Sung. People have been speculating about that cancerous growth. Was that cancerous growth an alien controlling him? We may never know!


