Kitten Harvesting

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Kitten Harvesting is the act of picking kittens off the Kitten tree for the use in types of cooking hardware, such as McDonald's hamburger cookers. Many enjoy this practice, as they can listen to the wonderful sound of fresh kittens whining.

[edit] Other Uses

Tree Kittens are much smaller than other types of the species, so they can easily be converted into powders, and then used for tea. "Kitten Yong" tea is favored by many Jedi cultures for its high level of the force, and it is used at many Jedi marriages to get rid of Darth Vader and his children for the luck of the newly wed couple. In 2005, a new "lifestyle" drug made out of powdered kitten, Viagitin, was released.

[edit] Controversy

In 1999, kittens were recalled after a McDonald's worker removed a used kitten from the cooker and left it in his closet. The reaction caused by the used kitten and his fabrics resulted in a explosion, and the incident was later recorded in the local newspaper, AAAAAAAAA!. Kittens rebelled against the harvesters, but later were finished off by the Bonzai Kitten industry.