Kronos
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| Shaka, The Soulbaker | Shaka is believed to sleep beneath the vulcan surface of Io, the innermost of the four Galilean moons of Jupiter. It is described by Kronos as a "seven dimensional hydra that feeds on tears" and is believed to be capable of redirecting comets from its sleeping state. | ||
| Kamoa, Who Laughs As You Beg | Kamoa is believed to sleep beneath the liquid metal surface of Saturn's moon Titan. Little is known about Kamoa, although Kronos has obliquely indicated that Kamoa is composed entirely of teeth. | ||
| Tottabakka | Tottabakka is thought to sleep on an asteroid within the Kuiper Belt. It is believed to periodically awaken and sip from the atmosphere of Neptune with a proboscis the length of a moon. | ||
Kronos, Who Makes Gods Tremble, is the only observed member of the Titan race, a collection of supernatural beings hibernating on an unknown number of celestial bodies within the Earth's solar system as they wait for The Time When They Shall Awaken And Devour. Kronos was prematurely roused from His Dread Slumber beneath the Earth's mantle by the United States military as a result of the Trinity Test, the first test of a nuclear weapon. The Trinity Test was conducted by the United States on July 16, 1945, at a location 35 miles (56 km) southeast of Socorro, New Mexico, on what is now White Sands Missile Range, after which Kronos woke from his den deep beneath the Earth and devoured Utah.
Kronos is best known for devouring Utah, converting the dreams of the world's children into a biofuel used to power his Timehammer, and dragging Larry King beneath the surface of the Earth to be slowly devoured over a period of millenia.
Alongside the recurring heroes and gods of Greek mythology, Kronos is a featured character in a handful of myths. He is said to have visited Mt. Olympus at the start of the Peloponnesian War, during which he pistol-whipped Ares, the Greek god of war, and for challenging Hercules to a duel on the Isle of Minos for the hand of the Minoan princess Arithreana, during which Hercules was pistol-whipped until his right eye eight-balled.
Chaos ┌───┴───┐ Chaos═╤═Chaos ┌───┴───┐ Amor═╤═Gaea │ ┌───Oranos═╤═Gaea │ │ │ ┌────┴────┐ │ Zeus══╤══Kronos │ Chaos══╪══Mewtwo Aphrodite/Venus══╪══Oscar Wilde (see here) │ ┌─────────────┴────────────────────────────┐ │ │ │ Clam │ Aphrodite════╪════Hermes │ │ │ ┌──Hermaphrodite ┌──────┬────────────┬─────┴───┬──────────────┬──────────────┤ ├───────────┐ │ │ │ │ │ │ │ │ Sonic Zeus════╤════Hera══╤══This Guy═╤═J. Neutron═╤═Fairy Godmother Wyatt══╤══Poseidon │ │ │ │ │ │ ┌────────┬────────┴───┐ │ └────┐ │ Carl Sagan═══╤═══Anonymous │ │ │ │ │ │ │ Pacman══╤══Mr. Love══╤══Hermes ├───Antithe Tinkerbell God═════╤════Virgin Mary═══╤═══Chronos │ │ │ ├───Athe │ │ Mothra═╤═Oscar Wilde Peter Pan─────┼───Pan Original Jesus═══╤═══Mary Magdalene ┌───┴────┬──────┬─────┐ └───Peter Griffin │ │ │ │ │ │ │ │ Tom Cruise Cecil Gene Ray │ ...and we all know what happened next │ │ │ │ │ Godzilla═╤═Google │ Goa Tse═══════╤═══Your Mom │ │ │ Mozilla Firefox═╤═Mew ┌────┴─────┐ │ │ │ Mewtwo │ Transvesta │ │ │ Splenda═╤═Wilford Brimley │ │ ...And you... │ ┌────┴─────┐ │ Diabeetis Meow Mix cheating
Categories: Stub | Ideas | Paleontology | Mythology | Greek gods
