Laser kittens
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I am would certainly be proud of this if they did it in Omaha.
~ Non-Huffable Kitten on Laser Kittens
Laser kittens were created when a horde of killer robots dumped live kittens in nuclear waste. Most of the test kittens were severely injured and used for kitten huffing but some could shoot laser beams from their eyes. After more laser kittens were made the kittens revolted turning all the robots into melted metal. After this the laser kittens had no home so they turned to Super Jesus. Super Jesus started caring for them and turned them into his minions of doom.
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[edit] The Oprah Incident
This large battle took place in Tokyo like in most monster fights the Japanese just stood and pointed. Oprah had help from Mothra and Mecha Buddha. Many kittens were slain by the merciless hands of Oprah. The fight ended when Super Jesus came to the aid of the laser kittens. Proof that laser kittens work,
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Fire not necessary to make kittens!(but it help)
[edit] The Great War
Laser kittens play a large role in World War III, where redneck zombies were wearn't the only ones getting pwned.
[edit] Kittens and Richard Simmons
One of the saddest things about the laser kittens is that Richard Simmons will routinley shave the kittens for their hair, in an effort to enlarge his white man fro. After the shaving sequnce is complete, he slays the kittens and turns them into puppets. He uses these puppets to help coreograph his dancing to the oldies video series.
[edit] Drag Queen Kittens
While rare, the drag queen laser kitten is very useful for natural rescources. Their leader is a mysterious creature known only as Ron Paul. They routinley breed at a place experts have labelled Brokeback Mountain. Most noteably, they urinate oil and crap out diamonds, making them rare.
[edit] The value of laser kittens
Laser kittens are very valuable to kitten huffers, due to the fact that it is a kitten and a laser in one huffable package. The value of laser kittens has inceased drastically as the use of lasers to enhance the kitten huffing experience has spread. This trend was of course started by that guy in an attempt to out-do this guy.
