Leatherface
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“The world would be more interesting if Leatha' was black...right?”
~ Martin Lawrence on Leatherface
“You damn fool! Look what you did to the door!”
~ The Cook on Leatherface
Leatherface is one of the most recognisable characters from the Texas Chainsaw massacre series of films. He is a vast man who typically wields a chainsaw and a tray of delicious, freshly-baked cookies...for he is the best cookie baker EVER! Ah ha ha ha haaaaa! The only known reason why he kils people with chainsaws is because once he has made the cookies he tries to cut them up with the chainsaw there for the cookies go everywhere and he blames it on other people.
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[edit] Life of a Teenage Robot
The films don't mention much about him, preferring instead to focus on his threatening appearance. However, he is extremely friendly, as is his brother Chop Top, often approaching people in an attempt to befriend them. They often run away screaming, or try to fight back, at which point he rips them in half in self-defense. Wouldn't you do exactly the same in his situation?
It's generally assumed that Leatherface is mentally damaged and retarded(shown in his strange fascination with cookies) and physically deformed (which is why he wears the mask, because even the mask is more attractive than his normal face). Leatherface's actual name is Aby Leathers, he lives in a yellow coat and eats sheep poo occasionally.
He has a big penis. Believe me.
He pierced me with that gigantic thing several times. mmmmmmmmmmmm
[edit] Inspiration
The events of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre films are, like all horror films, based on the annual picnics of the Skull and Bones society. Leatherface is based on Ronald McDonald and his actions at the picnics, just toned down a little. For instance, Ronald killed all the teens, whereas Leatherface only wanted to be friends. Ronald's cookies were really drugged, whereas with Leatherface's, it was just an assumption based on his frightening appearance.
[edit] Intro to the new version of oh christmas tree
Oh leatherface oh leatherface bring me a severed head
be nice and bloody and nice and red i really hope it is dead
oh leatherface oh leatherface bring me a severed head
[edit] See also
- Texas Chainsaw massacre
- The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2
- The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Cookies mutilate
- The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The return of the cookies
- Skull and Bones
- Ronald McDonald
- Shit
Phil Rodgers (Vicious sexual predator)


