Life on Mars
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Life on Mars is a BBC television series, based on the life of David Bowie.
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[edit] Premise
Life on Mars tells the story of a police officer, Pete Tyler (played by Graham Norton), who is hit by a car and dies, only to wake up to find himself on an alien planet, where society is based entirely on old 70's sitcoms.
[edit] Production
The original concept for the programme was devised in 1973, when its creator accidentally ate some bad cheese and began having vivid hallucinations.
Originally titled Carry on Ziggy, the series was initially rejected by the BBC, who felt that it was too silly.
Reworked as a two-hour drama, and retitled Carry on Ford Granada, the series was again rejected.
After several more changes, and lots more cheese, the show eventually aired, and received rave reviews from its production staff.
[edit] Music
In spite of the title, no actual David Bowie songs are used in the series, primarily due to high licence fees.
Instead, most songs are performed by the Bowie parody band, The Stardusters, who are really quite dreadful.
[edit] Episode Guide
[edit] Series One
Episode 1:
- When flatmates Chrissy and Jo find Tyler asleep in their bath, they convince their landlord that he's gay, so that he'll be allowed to move in with them.
Episode 2:
- Tyler's girlfriend, Rita, takes him home to meet her family, including her loud and bigoted father, who takes an immediate disliking to him.
Episode 3:
- In order to make ends meet, Tyler is forced to take a job at a local hotel, but finds it difficult to work with the eccentric owner.
Episode 4:
- After being evicted, Tyler moves in with his friend Gary, and begins spending most of his time drinking and watching television.
Episode 5:
- Tyler gets drunk and passes out, only to find out that he's been conscripted into service on a mining ship, and that his only companions are a hologram and a cat.
Episode 6:
- Tyler escapes from the mining ship and goes to work in a scrapyard.
Episode 7:
- Tyler's new girlfriend, Fran, gets him a job at a book shop, but he discovers that the owner is the most disagreeable employer he's worked for so far.
Episode 8:
- Tyler sees a mysterious blue box and meets a girl who claims to be his daughter from the future. He is struck by another car, and the first series ends on a cliffhanger.
[edit] Series Two
Episode 1:
- Tyler finds he's been transported a further thirty years into the past, to the 1940s. He joins the Home Guard, and annoys Captain Mainwaring by insisting on having evidence that suspects really are Nazi spies and not just local eccentrics.
Episode 2:
- Still stuck in the Martian equivalent of the 1940s, Tyler joins an army concert party, and comes in to conflict with his violent, homophobic, racist, bad-tempered Sergeant-Major.
Episode 3:
- Tyler attempts to follow time-traveller Gary Sparrow back home, but takes a wrong turn, and ends up back in the wrong time.
Episode 4:
- Back in the Martian equivalent of the 70s, Tyler arrives in a Surbiton garden where Tom and Barbara's pig is giving birth.
Episode 5:
- Tyler pops out of a music box in Camberwick Green. (Oh, wait, that's what really happens in the episode!)
Episode 6:
- Tyler gets caught up in an argument between Eddie and his West Indian neighbour Bill.
Episode 7:
- Tyler gets a new job selling junk in the Grot shop, but finds his boss Reggie to be a bit too eccentric.
Episode 8:
- Pete Tyler finally gets back to Earth, and meets his mysterious daughter again in Canary Wharf. A Vogon Constructor Fleet arrives and demolishes Earth, but Tyler grabs his daughter and flees back to Mars just in time.
- Most of the ongoing plot threads were tied up in this final episode (although many of them were simply too silly and therefore completely ignored). The central mystery, however, was intentionally left ambiguous, and thus it is left up to viewers to decide for themselves the answer to the biggest question: Were the writers actually on drugs or simply insane?
[edit] Spin-offs
The BBC has announced that there will be a number of spin-off series. So far, only Ashes to Ashes has received official confirmation.
[edit] Ashes to Ashes
Ashes to Ashes will be set in Wakefield Crematorium, it will follow the hilarious antics of it's staff who do all sorts of amusing things like putting the manager in the oven because he didn't want to give them a pay raise.
[edit] Other proposed spin-offs
Life in Mars Bars
- The Panorama team goes undercover to expose the shocking lack of hygiene control in chocolate factories. This is referred to as their "Hygiene Hunt" (or 'Gene Hunt for short).
Life on Veronica Mars
- "My name is Veronica Mars. I had an accident and woke up in a different time slot. Have I been pre-empted, cancelled, or put on hiatus? Whatever's happened it's like I'm on a different network. Now maybe if I can work out the reason, I can get renewed for another series."
Lies from Mars
- Anne Robinson presents a special Watchdog investigation, revealing that the little robots weren't telling the truth when they said Smash was better than real potatoes.
Ides of March
- "My name is Julius Caesar. I had an accident and woke up in 44BC. Am I crazy, in a coma, or back in time? Whatever's happened it's like I'm in a different country. Now maybe if I can work out the reason, I can get home before Brutus stabs me."
Limes on Stars
- Celebrities balance citrus fruits on their heads for charity. Despite the title, there are no actual stars, just the usual Z-list crowd.
Lines of Cars
- "My name is Father Dougall. I had an accident and woke up as a cat in the year 5,000,000,053. Am I crazy, in a coma, or forward in time? Whatever's happened it's like New Earth's a different planet. No, hang on there, it is a different planet. Sorry. Now maybe if this traffic starts moving, I can get somewhere."
Lights in Bars
- "My name is Gene Hunt. I had an accident and woke up in 1st July 2007. Then I went into a bar and tried to light a fag, but some moaning dorothy told me I wasn't allowed to do that any more. So I punched him in the face and kicked seven shades of shit out of him."
Ch-Ch-Changes
- Under enormous pressure to replicate the success of Life on Mars, the producers are currently scrambling to come up with ideas for other Bowie-song-title-based series, but so far haven't been able to think of anything beyond the titles themselves.
Life on MRSA
- Tyler returns to the hospital ward after having an accident and waking up with MRSA. He then finds himself in a strange world where no-one gives a toss about how to perform real conduct, ie: Clevedon.
- The only spinoff so far actually made, which, oddly enough, is actually set on Saturn.
[edit] Anachronisms
Some observant viewers have noticed several minor anachronisms in episodes of Life on Mars.
These viewers clearly have far too much time on their hands.
[edit] Reviews
“Life On Mars is just childish rubbish, not proper grown-up science fiction like Doctor Who.”
~ science fiction fans on series one
“Life On Mars has always been proper grown-up science fiction, not childish rubbish like Torchwood”
~ the same science fiction fans on series two
“In Soviet Russia, Mars watches life on YOU!!”
~ Russian reversal on Life on Mars
“The only thing worse than being knocked down then waking to find yourself trapped on a Martian world based on old sitcoms is... umm... I'll have to get back to you on that one, ok?”
~ Oscar Wilde on Life on Mars


