Truth about Lithuanians
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“Hmmm... no, I'm not a squirrel. But I can tell you some true things about Lithuanians, for example...”
~ Oscar Wilde on Lithuanians
Contents |
[edit] About trust
Lithuanians are always waiting to get something for free (authority or lottery prizes).
Lithuanians don't trust in banks, government, the USA, currency, neighbors, friends, discounts, businessmen...
Lithuanians believe in the end of the world, a good president, and an unbiased media.
Landsbergis is to blame for everything.
[edit] About Government
[edit] About Agriculture
Agriculture is holy for Lithuanians.
Lithuanians originated from Indians, so cows are holy animals to Lithuanians.
Pork, grain, sugar-beets, and potatoes are holy as well, for similar reasons.
If Lithuanian starts to raise cows, pigs, grain, sugarbeets or potatoes, he must do it his entire life.
Agriculture is holy, so all money must be donated to agriculture (like to the church).
Landsbergis is to blame for everything.
[edit] About the People
[edit] About Basketball
Basketball is a religion.
The supreme god is Sabas.
A basketball player can rape a women once a year if he's really good at basketball.
[edit] About Lithuanian Consistency
A true Lithuanian studies only one time in his life, and works in only one workplace.
A True Lithuanian never changes his job or workplace.
A True Lithuanian laborer works for free.
Landsbergis is to blame for everything.
When large amounts of Lithuanians are killed, an accordion player climbs atop the bodies and plays the national anthem.
[edit] About Lithuanian Solutions to Problems
Many Lithuanians solve all their problems by reducing blood pressure in their heads, in other words by using a noose on their necks.
Other Lithuanians solve their problems by barricading roads, starving or burning themselves.
Lithuanian policemen don't use the "blood pressure reduction" method, they shoot themselves in their workplaces.
Landsbergis is to blame for everything.
==Money-- There can never be too much money.
[edit] Translated from
lithuania is the greatest country in the world!!!
