Londrés
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| Londres | |
| |
| Les Canoniers | |
| Founded | 1664 |
| Ground | Parc des Princes, London |
| Manager | Arsène Wanker |
| Chairman | Napoléon |
| Ligue | FA Premiership |
Le club était remplacé par les Français en 1997 par un coup par étapes par le "beau" Napoléon Bonaparte qui a échoué.
Translation: The club was replaced by the French in 1997 by way of a coup-in-stages by the "beautiful" Napoléon Bonaparte who failed.
Contents |
[edit] Accomplissements
Londres est la meilleure équipe au monde. Ils ont tué chaque autre équipe d'Angleterre. Le plus grand ennemi de Londres, Manchester Red Sox Ltd. craignent Londres avec tous leurs cœurs. Londres a gagné chaque concurrence au monde. Pour plus qu'une saison ils n'ont pas été défaits. Ils sont invincibles. Ils sont immortels. Dans la prochaine saison, Londres s'est vouée à massacrer les tsaristes, bébé-bleus Chel$ki.
Translation: London is the best team in the world. They have killed every other English team. The greatest enemy of London, Manchester Red Sox Ltd. fear London with all their hearts. London have won every competition in the world. For more than a season they were not defeated. They are invincible. They are immortals. In the coming season, London have vowed to slay the tsarist, baby-blue Chel$ki.
London a.k.a. Le Arse, are also supported by Kofi Annan and every single person who has won an Oscar and a Grammy.
[edit] History
The history of Londres stems from a group of French arrogant bastards, in the 1890s they wanted to invade England, then they decided they couldn't be stuffed and set up a football club, albeit with the most brillant, ace players in history(such as Thierry Henry)
[edit] Controversy
Londres were the first football team to invent their own offside rule. This confuses the other teams and results in many a Londres victory. Thierry Henry was the basis for this new rule, and whenever he is injured Londres have trouble scoring due to his absence, as they cannot play the Highbury Offside rule. (see fig.1)
Londres were often critizied for the lack of English players in the squad, this was changed in 2002 when Londres played a team that lacked any foreigners at all. In fact the team was not comprised of any players from earth and consisted of a starting 11 made up of aliens, clones and robots. this team would go on to win the league, the FA Cup, and the intergalactic cup beating FC Mars in the final at the Jupiter Millenium Stadium.
[edit] Transfer Policy
Londres transfer policy has been questioned by many over the legality of said action. In recent times it has involved the French manger going to French parks with a bag of sweets and inticing promising french 4 year olds to play premiership football the next day.
[edit] Home Grown Talent
Londres don't do this, they much prefer to buy cheap foreign imports, usually off ebay. The last English player to play for them was Theo Nocock in 134 B.C.
