MSN

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what happens to people when there is no one to talk to on their list

this is what happened to the msn-guy when he would not stop annyoing the crap out of the Mafia

“I was a Mini Sex Nutter. I did it all the time with my gorilla of a mum.”

~ Daid Anderson on MSN

“In Soviet Russia, MSN talk on YOU!!”

~ Russian Reversal on MSN

“Finally microsoft got something right”

~ Some Sarcastic person on MSN

“I'M LOVIN IT”

~ Fat kid from McDonalds while feasting on his BigBigBigMac on MSN

“It crashes constantly!”

~ Captain Obvious on MSN

“The biggest and the best..I could send my plays to the pope by clicking "add file"”

~ Shakespeare on MSN

MSN (or Men Sex Network) are collections of Internet services provided by Minisin. Initially released by accident on August 24, 1995, to coincide with the release of Widow's 950000, the range of services has not changed. The Hotflail was then introduced, a service to kill all n00bs with a burning flail. This was later changed to Widow's Laxative Flail. The instant fast-food service MSN Messer, was recently replaced by a tramp called: "Widow's Laxative Mess". It is also home to the evil of msn names

MSN was largely re-branded in 2006 when Minisin overhauled its online software and services in a climate of increasing competition from rivals such as Gargole, Yak who? and Skip. (Should I even mention AOL and all that disgrace?)

In the United States, this is not just a content provider and search engine, this is a Widow's unbearably cool mouth-watering and desirably home-made content provider and search engine. It is additionally a ISP (ice-cream sucker party). With 9 subscribers (perhaps 90), MSN is the second largest ice-cream sucker party in the US behind AOL ~~suckers~~ service with 26.5 people, the .5 being a Hobbit by the name of John.

The term "MSN" has come to be synonymous with MSN Messenger in T'internet slang. To use MSN services, the users must let Minisin hack their computer using Microsoft Hacking Device and huff all the "SYSTEM 32" files. One can sign up using any e-mail address (although it will not alert you of any incoming emails if you use non-widowed addresses, which is only understandable behaviour of the widow), and can then use personalised MSN (now Laxative) features requiring the use of a Microsoft Hacking Device. These personalised features include "My MiniSexNutter", "Hotflail" and the ability to sign into "Widow's Laxative Mess"(formerly MSN Messer), and the now retired Widow's Mess.

1 History
2 The Percentage Of MSN Users
3 Flash! Flash!
4 Side-Effects

[edit] History

msn messenger virus

Widow's Mess -> MSN Messer -> Widow's Laxative Mess.

[edit] The Percentage Of MSN Users

Keroro & Pluton - 100%
Normal People - 9%
Crazy psychos - 17%
Ducks - 23%
Satanists - 11%
Bogans - 200%
Dead people - 39%
People that don't get enough sex - 90%
Human - 35%
Animals - 23%
Aliens - 42%
Single Moms - 51%
Your mom - 34%
Paedophiles - 10%
People who struggle with the concept of percentages - 764.3%

[edit] Flash! Flash!

When Satan's Secretary of Human Punishment (Dick Cheney) conducted a research to how an internet service could be as evil as the bowels of hell, he concluded that MSN really was a MSN (Massive Sex-oriented Network), and WLM continues to be WLM (Whorish Lamentation Media).Therefore, both Conservatives and Hippies have turned their backs on the service, claiming both "Sex should be for a sacred purpose!" (procreation) and "Sex should be for a.. a sacred purpose, mannnn!" (Midget loving, though some believe kitten huffing to be involved).The radical drop in use of the MSN or WLM services frightened Minisin to no end, while Gargole's Instant Masturbatory service sky-rocketed.

[edit] Side-Effects

Please note that the following side effects may be experienced when using MSN:

Loss of mind
Loss of life
Loss of temper
Any messages you may type to others can and will be checked by MSN and promptly not delivered to all recipients unless much promotion of the MSN corporation or it's affiliates ~~is included~~ is your message in it's entirety.
Believing In Every Single Chain Mail That Some Paedophile Sends You.
just waiting for bill gates to invent a pc you can have sex with

So please bear the following facts in mind when using MSN:

Your computer/laptop cannot survive the drop out of your window, so try to refrain from throwing it there, and instead throw it somewhere safer.
MSN reserves the right to screw you over as and when it feels like it, for its own amusement, or the amusement of its friends in order to look cool.
Before using MSN, you must sign over your soul to the boss of the MSN corporation, in accordance with MSN's damnation decree.
Never EVER call MSN the most evil product in the world, ~~even though it is~~. Anything "most evil" falls under license of Torture Inc., the multinational corporation started by Saddam Hussein, which had a corporate takeover by Satan Industries since then. Saddam reserves the right to endorse Torture Inc., and does it merrily.
Delete every single message you receive, even the ones that are no junk.
A severe lack of friends.

[edit] The Average MSN Conversation

0101Traces..::.23.001 says: sup

$$$Brandogg=sex$$$ says: nmu

0101Traces..::.23.001 says: nm

$$$Brandogg=sex$$$ says: k

0101Traces..::.23.001 says: brb

$$$Brandogg=sex$$$ says: k lol

0101Traces..::.23.001 says: bak

$$$Brandogg=sex$$$ says: k

0101Traces..::.23.001 says: g2g

$$$Brandogg=sex$$$ says: cya

$$$Brandogg=sex$$$ says:sht

[edit] Standard MSN Conversation between a male and a female

Female: Holla
Male: Was up nigga
Female: i feel horny?
Male: ummm... are u drunk?( a big pause)....
Female: no juss felling alone and horny? (with a heart smiley)
Male: lets have computer sex
long silence*
Male: *With slightly more interest* do u hav a webcam?
Female: yea baby, y?
Male: can u turn it on plz?
Female *Turns webcam on*
Male: take your clothes off bb and get a lil closer to the cam
long silence as Female tries to get comfortable for the male.
female female shows part of breast and the male starts to jack off*
male *i juss had a big reaction

[edit] Standard MSN Conversation between a male and a female who have not talked before

Male: Hey there!
Female: Hiya!
Male: asl?
Female: Umm... 15/f/AL
Male: lol
Male: were u live?
Female: um...
Male: lol i am 16/m/CA
Female: lol
Male: u got webcam?
Male: ?
Female: lol yeahh...
Male: want to strip on cam
Female: lol k
Female strips for Male
Male im done
Male has disconnected

Female cries

[edit] Standard MSN Conversation between two male furries who haven't met

Yiffsalot: Woof! ^^
Merfy McMerfmerf: Yip! *Cuddles* ^^
Yiffsalot: Wanna yiff?
Merfy McMerfmerf: Sure!

Yiff Commences

[edit] Standard MSN Conversation between a regular male and a furry male

Captain Cub: Woof! Hi! ^^
Male: ...
Captain Cub: Whassa matter? o.o *whines, pokes, and puts up a crying fox emoticon*
Male: You are.
Captain Cub: How? *whinnies and puts his cock back in*
Male: You're a furry.
Captain Cub: That's mean. *cries* You should learn to respect my beliefs! I was a beautiful wolf in my past life!
Male: You're an idiot.
Captain Cub: OMG FURSECUTION!
Male: *Disconnects from MSN*
Captain Cub: *Looks up cub porn*