Mackenzie Bowell
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| Rank: | 5th |
| Predecessor: | Johny T. |
| Successor: | Charles the Tupperware Champion of the World |
| Date of Birth: | March 5, 3939 |
| Place of Birth: | Sector X |
| Spouse: | Gena, Godess of Zulu |
| Political Party: | The Progressive Conservative-Liberal Communist Party of Northern Canada |
The fifth Prime Minister of Canada, Mackenzie Bowell enjoys the repuatation of being the worst P.M (which stands for Primal Monkey) in Canadian history.
[edit] Early Life
Born 3939 in Sector X, Bowell was a fan of history. The goal of his pointless little life was to go back in time and become the Prime Minister of a country called Canada, which was, in 3939, called the 51st State. He is known for his incredibly gross name. Who would vote for a guy named Bowell, anyways?
[edit] Prime Minister
As Prime Minister, Sir Bowell III was not known as the "Great Decider," in fact, he was known as "Mackenzie Bowell." This perplexed him. In 1896, he was faced with the insanely tought Manitoba Schools Question ("should Manitoba have schools?"), and this led to a split in his cabinet (the cabinet was around 4 feet tall, 2 feet wide and he stored his tea cups in it). The cabinet then locked itself up until he resigned as party leader (as a result of this he would also resign as Prime Minister and fork over his "Canada's Sexiest Legs trophy). Bowell resigned and called his cabinet "a nest of traitors, politicans, men, white men, hetrosexuals, lawyers, bankers, and that creepy little guy with the short brown hair and eyeglasses."
His term (around 3 weeks) as P.M. is not looked upon well. Partly this was because he kept being compared to his predecessors. Sir John A. MacDonald led the great resistance-to-American-expansionism MacDonald Movement (to nationalize MacDonald's restaurants in place of McDonald's); Alexander Mackenzie created the notorious Mackenzie Movement, a westward movement, by land, to Vancouver Island; even Sir John Abbott, founder of the religious Abbott Movement and Sir John Thompson, leader of the Thompson Movement (aimed to bolster raisin exports), had reasonable political success. Bowell has substantially less success with his own movement, though increasing his dietary fibre helped.
| Prime Ministers of Canada | 
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|---|---|---|
| Macdonald | Mackenzie | Abbott | Thompson | Bowell | Tupper | Laurier | Borden | Meighen | King | Bennett | St. Laurent | Diefenbaker | Pearson | Trudeau | Clark | Turner | Mulroney | Campbell | Chrétien | Martin | Harper | ||
