Man periods
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A man period is simply the natural menstruation cycle that occurs in certain men. Its scientific name is "Vir sanguine" meaning "Blood of the Man".
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[edit] Origins and History
Up until approximately 2500 years ago, it was believed menstruation only happened to women. At that time, menstruation was known as "womenstruation". The earliest recorded evidence of man periods was found in a Roman document describing the strange activity of Roman senator, Ranjitimus Paulimus. The Latin reads, "Igitur te nonnisi fides vir quisnam crudus ex suus snatch". This roughly translates to "Therefore you shall not trust the man who bleeds out his snatch" The Romans really took this to heart, and in fact the two criminals who were crucified with Jesus (and hell, maybe Jesus himself) were being punished for their menstrual symptoms. Man periods also caused the Crusades, because, dammit, Pope Urban II had some reaaaaly bad cramps and his Turkish Delight just wasn't cutting it.
[edit] A Scientific Fact
Scientifically, it is believed that man periods are influenced by a person's surroundings, similar to homosexuality. If a given individual is exposed to uptight conditions and retains these, he is 86% more likely to develop a man period in comparison with boys who had a normal upbringing. It has also been discovered that men who are raised in a wealthy and/or aristocratic environment (such as The Woodlands, Texas), the percentage of men who have man periods increases.
Unlike women, a male's periods do not end with menopause. Since a male egg has yet to be discovered, men with periods experience them frequently until the age of their death. Furthermore, as the older a man gets, the more frequent his periods become. His periods also become much more intense and with worsening symptoms. You know that grumpy old man who lives down the street? Effectively, he is just living in an eternal state of menstruation.raja
[edit] In Religion
If female periods win a woman a ticket to hell, then male periods are no different. Religious folk generally consider men who develop periods to be the fruit of the devil. Their attitudes towards people and life in general are responsible for this accurate assumption. In the Book of Trey (which was conveniently not included in the Bible), Jesus agrees with the Roman author who spoke out against Ranjitimus Paulimus and states that "Any man who experiences menstruation is to be considered an unforgivable sinner". This is the only known sin which is unable to be forgiven in Christianity. Christ, however, was a hypocrite. The famous images and statues of Jesus being stabbed with the soldier's spear with his blood gushing out is actually a false story created by the Church. Jesus actually released the water and blood that supposedly came from his side out of his very own snatch (as depicted in Trey 4:35-36).
[edit] Modern Age
Since the first recordings of man periods, the frequency of man periods has increased, and the age that men have begun menstruating has lowered to ages 13-15 (from around 20-25). It is estimated that about 15% of the male population experiences man periods.
[edit] See Also
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