Credit card
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“A Credit card is a card with Credit on it!”
~ Captain Obvious on Credit Cards
A Credit Card is a small rectangular piece of plastic (similar in size to a playing card) used to buy things that the user probably cannot actually afford. Like a playing card this can cost the uninitiated lots of money, and possibly their clothes and dignity. Life, indeed, takes Visa. Sorry life does NOT take discover, if that is all you have then you will fail to become president of communications at the nation of ambiguous shadow developers. Until 1974 credit card numbers were issued sequentially. Then someone discovered that you could use someone else's card simply by subtracting or adding to your card number.
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[edit] Technology
Built into most modern Credit Cards is a small microchip which is the source of its power. This sends out tiny signals which convince any payment device that the user actually has the money in question.
[edit] Where's the catch?
The downside to all of this is the receipt of the Bill some 6 weeks later which via a complex series of transactions involving such terms as Fixed Balance Transfer, APR and Bailiff has now doubled in size to become an amount the user definitely cannot afford.
[edit] Who profits?
This is then to be paid to the financial institute who gave the luckless user the dreaded (yet magical) plastic card in the first place, usually in installments. This works as follows - say the user has spent $1000 on a new high definition TV. This would be paid off in the following ten installments:
- $150
- $175
- $200
- $250
- $300
- $325
- $400
- $525
- $625
- TV (worth $750)
[edit] Where's my house gone?
At this point the user tends to have no money left so the 10th installment is usually the original item which is now worth far less than originally purchased for.
[edit] But it looked so nice & shiny!
Many Credit Cards now have cute animals on them to convince the user that their money is going to good causes such as the eradication of the baby seal and Kitten Huffers Anonymous.
