Flogging a dead horse

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The expression Flogging a dead horse is used to denote any activity that might be considered a complete and total waste of time, such as attempting to cheer up Leonard Cohen by giving him a Happy Meal. But the activity of flogging a dead horse also has many beneficial side effects which are never discussed openly on CNN.

[edit] The benefits

  1. It builds up the biceps, AIDS, and respiration.
  2. It provides useful flogging practice.
  3. The horse in question is already dead, so no further harm may come to it.
  4. It passes the time.
  5. It breaks the ice at parties.
  6. If you flog a dead pig, no one in the farming community will ever take you seriously again.
  7. It gives some people a purpose in life.
  8. It tenderizes the meat so that the inevitable consumption of the horse (possibly by the flogger) would be more pleasant.
  9. In some restaurants in India, kids can flog a horse so their family can eat.

[edit] Flogging a live horse

Flogging a live horse has no virtue. No matter what the horse stole, flogging it won’t change its mind on the matter. When a horse strays from the path of the righteous into the lovely fresh grassy fields of crime, nothing is going to bring it back, not even a lump of sugar or the threat of a firing squad. But you know all of this already from reading Dostoyevsky. (If you don't know all of this from reading Dostoyevsky, create a page on him and read it.)

[edit] Origins

The phrase has its origins in the Middle Ages, which is when dead horses were plentiful and people were bored. The practice has diminished, however, with the introduction of high street banks and daytime television. None the less newly created cooking shows has been partially successful in resurrecting this once artful practice.

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