Mauritius

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Mauritius
(Official Flag of Mauritus)
Population Total - ~3 Billion
Form of Government Dictatorial Republic
National Anthem Random Ringtones
Current Monarch Mamie Clown
Currency Dal Pouris, Milk powder, gateaux piment, samousa
Capital City The City of Rodrigues

Mauritius is an island nation, located only slightly outside Earth's orbit. Many people believe Mauritius is off the coast of Africa, but that's actually an optical illusion that was put there by the Mauritians so no one would bother them. Attempts to go to this illusion usually gets a 404 Not Found Error.

Contents

[edit] Politics

Being the only nation that is in Earth's orbit, it often has problems being hit with all the nuclear missiles George W. Bush keeps firing at the Martians. When the Mauritian fuhrer, Keith Urban, asked Bush to stop because the missiles were hitting the country, Bush responded, "Sorry, I was aimin' at Uranus lolololol!!!11" then proceeded to attack Mauritius because, "they've got oil". This is true because Mauritius has every possible resource that comes out of their main landmark, the internet. Mauritius is currently fascist. When asked why, Fuhrer Keith Urban systematically executed the reporter. Questions about fascism have never been asked since. Well, two more reporters asked the question, but it sounds cooler to say that it has never been asked since.

[edit] Economy

Being in earth's orbit, trade is especially annoying for Mauritians since they only have one jetpack which Furher Urban ordered that they share. However, in 2004 the jetpack was destroyed when someone logged into Mauritius, got on the jetpack and started spamming the lines saying, "sriuzly guys wat buton is up". He then crashed into the ground causing an earthquake that split New Zealand into two pieces. Because they can no longer get to the ground, Mauritians usually don't buy anything. All their possessions come from UFOs that get sucked into earth's orbit and crashland onto Mauritius.

For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Mauritius.

[edit] Population

Mauritius, despite being extremely small, holds over twenty billion people. No one has yet figured out how this is possible but some of it may be attributed to the secret sea Indian-owned tunnel that runs to India and its population, thereby making Mauritius a colony of India. Similar underwater tunnels are believed to exist to connect Mauritius to China and Africa. If you believe in the outerspace theory on Mauritius' location, these tunnels are actually blackholes. An important factor that must be considered when dealing with the population of Mauritius is the fact that Yasin Allyjaun although born in England originates from Mauritius. Thus it must be remembered that the population of Mauritius is twenty billion plus Yasin Allyjaun.

[edit] History

As far as i can remember, Mauritius is a man made creation of the great creator Senator Palpatine, nearly 2,000 years from now. Which means that Mauritius is almost 2,000 years old now. It is also said that in order to prevent any people (any Mauritian) from living on the island, Palpatine grew huge forests and invited many other worldly creatures like the Dodo, the Solitaire(is a bird, not the game), the T-Rex, Godzilla and E.T to inhabit the island.

Unfortunately, no one can stop the laws of nature, what Palpatine feared took place. Some stupid dutch, using the stupid excuse of a tropical cyclone, shipwrecked on Mauritius. Along with their voracious appetite, they also brought rats to destroy the nests of the Dodo and to have unsafe sex with the other animals on Mauritius.

Voracious appetite and unsafe sex together caused the extinction of the Dodo, but that is another story. After seeing all the messed that they caused on this island, the Dutch felt ashamed and decided to left the island for good. However, they will need ships and since they lost their last ship in the storm, they will need to build new ones. So they deforested the entire island (as if killing all our Dodos was not enough) to build their boats.

Then the French came and eventually followed by the British. Since the British and the French were old friends, they decided to fight each other at Grand Port ( as a game )--neoanderson12@gmail.com 17:57, 26 July 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Military

Mauritius is the biggest supplier of Clones for the Army of the Republic(not Kamino as they wanted to make us believe) due to its huge population. Everybody thinks that clones are the exact replica of a person. This is not the case in Mauritius. Inside the armor, Mauritians are very different from one another. There are Chinese, Hindus, Muslims and Christians. In fact, they could be very well called as Mauritians, but it didn't sound very cool. Senator Palpatine thought that it was too costly to pay these damn cloners on Kamino, so he just tapped into the huge population that happened to be found in Mauritius and that was too big for such a little island. So now, whenever you see a clone die in a Star Wars movie, you must understand that it was just another Mauritian that fought honorably on the battlefield. Image:Clone_army.jpg

Here are the casualties according to the Star Wars Episodes:

1. Attack of the Clones
300 KIA
2. Clone War
600,000 KIA
3. Revenge of the Sith
200 KIA
4. From Episode 4 to 6
24,000 KIA
5. After Destruction of the second Death Star
32,800 KIA, and still counting

Mauritius not only supply the army but also all the military logistics such as laser weapons, plasma tanks and many other WMD's that they create themselves using their own stupidities. --neoanderson12@gmail.com 14:53, 23 July 2008 (UTC)Mauritius once tried to join the UN but Prime Minister Tony Blair replied, "Do you support the War in Iraq?" to which Fuhrer Urban replied, "Not really, no." Tony Blair then denied their request, saying, "The last thing we need is another intelligent country in the UN."

[edit] Criticism of Mauritius

90% of the whole population of Mauritius are plain stupid. Of the rest 10%, 9% went abroad, thinking that they were too intelligent to live and work in Mauritius, but in vain, the countries where they went to settle down were far too advance for them. The remaining 1% are truly intelligent, but they have not yet realized it. Perhaps sometimes in the near future--neoanderson12@gmail.com 15:01, 23 July 2008 (UTC). Ask an American "have you ever been to Mauritius?" and their answer will be something along the lines of "Mauritius?! WTF is THAT???"

[edit] Religion

The Pope has declared the country is Catholic. Because Mauritius is in space, no one has bothered to tell them that Catholocism has been dissolved. As it looks, it is doubtful anyone cares.

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