McDonald's Ice Cream
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| McDonald's Ice Cream | |
|---|---|
| Image:Icecream321.jpg You could even buy more!! | |
| Kingdom | Food |
| Phylum | Junkfood |
| Class | Mcdonaldsfat |
| Order | Eat first |
| Family | Ice, family of ice |
| Genus | Fat |
| Species | McDonald's ice cream |
| Binomial Name | AAAAAAAAA! |
| Primary Armament | |
| Secondary Armament | Buzz |
| Power Supply | /dev/null |
| HP: | 1 health point |
| Mana Points: | 0.0001 |
| Strength: | 55km/s/s |
| Intelligence: | IQ 150 |
| Weight | 88g. |
| Length | 22.67423cm |
| Special Attack | Frozo |
| Conservation Status | 
|
The McDonald's Ice Cream is a beautiful creation. It is commonly attributed to not being Ice Cream, but rather Ice Cream Substitute. It leaves sugary fat all over your face if it's eaten properly. This fatty treat is perfect if you have a longing desire to become fat, just buy 15 of them and eat quick. Best to be eaten before and after meals, during toilet stops, riding a horse, in tiny spaces and during a work interview.
Unfortunately this wonderful invention costs 20 cents more these days but it is still a very cheap and nutritious meal.
Contents |
[edit] How do I eat my McDonald's Ice Cream?
The best way to eat a McDonald's Ice Cream is to eat it as quickly as possible making sure you have more around your mouth and on your clothes then on the cone.
You can even make friends with your McDonald's Ice Creams. After all you will be spending a lot of time with such a wonderful treat.
Make sure when you buy said ice cream that you have more McDonald's Ice Creams and McDonald's take-away then you can possibly afford, this gives your fatty look an extra boost.
To explain this method in more detail, follow the following steps:
- Print these instructions
- Get into car (take instructions)
- Learn to drive
- Drive to McDonalds
- Walk inside
- Purchase ice cream. If you have no money, see How To Get a Job
- Take ice cream from underpaid slave
- Sit down
- Eat
- Repeat steps 6 to 9 until ice cream have covered your entire body, or your head has asploded
If you still need more detail, see Eating McDonald's Ice Cream (Simple Version).
[edit] What is the actual ice cream made of?
Some say a McDonald's Ice Cream is made from entirely from pig fat, others say that they don't care because it tastes really really really good. By the laws of McDonald's Agreement we aren't actually allowed to tell you where the actual ice cream comes from. All we can say is that every bite is just a delicious as the first and no matter how many you eat you'll still become something like the Buddha-esque figure in the picture above.
The following theories exist for the creation of the common McDonalds Ice Cream:
[edit] Pig Fat
Unfortunately there is no information on this topic.
Apologies.
See the wonderful page of Pig.
[edit] Human Body Parts
There are some theorists that believe that McDonalds Ice Creams are made of human body parts, mashed up. They believe that the cream itself is a mixture of brains, and bones (thus giving the white colour, yet smooth complextion), and that the cone is made of skin, hardened by old blood.
This is a belief believed by few people, as a much higher proportion of people believe in other things than in the people ice cream theory. Actually, another theory was released shortly after this theory, suggesting that only one person believes this theory, thus meaning the number of believers remains constant (1 person, until he or she dies, that is), wheres the percentage of beleivers, in contrast to world population is constantly decreasing due to world population increase.
