Meow

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia think they have an article about Meow.

Meow (pronounced "nya", as it's adherents are generally also are anime nuts, and like pretending they're japanese) is both a word commonly uttered by anime addicts who have entered their third stage of addiction, as well as the term used to describe said individuals ("meows").

Meows often will add the word "nya" within sentences at seemingly random frequency and position. This word is rarely heard as part of any phrase or sentence by non-meows, and thus is considered automatic grounds for the employment of the Dogu's Ocular Reed-Knifing (DORK) test in order to detect meowiness.

[edit] Common Uses

"meow I'm a kitty" "meow you stole my cocoa puffs!" "meoaaaaow she's hot"

[edit] DORK Testing

DORK testing is used to assess the ability of the subject's retinas to follow real-life objects, as often anime addicts are unable to perceive motion past 14 frames per second. The subjects are placed in a wind tunnel, where they must use a knife to cut at reeds as they whip back-and-forth in the wind. Those unable to perceive the motion of the reeds properly are considered to have reached the "fourth stage" of addiction, and are almost un-cureable. All others are given a lollipop for their troubles, and sold to the circus (proceeds go to Dogu's Happy Fun Fund).

[edit] The Uncureable

Those few who are uncureable, must face off in a Collectible Card Game duel with other fourth-stage addicts. Tournament winners are then clothed in furry animal suits, and released into the wild.

"I'm a cow."

[edit] What animal meows

Well, top leading scientists, A.K.A. people who don't have anything better to do than make everyone else look dumb, have proved that originally the sound "meow" came from a dog. Then the cows came and stole the sound "meow" and gave the dogs "woof." Cows are those little animals with whiskers that make the sound "meow". They are not very likeable and if you see one you should probably call it a sound theiving little rascall. Just an update on this story, cows have got the sound "meow" stolen from them and now rabbits have that sound "meow" the cows sound now is "I'm a cow."

[edit] History of the meow

In recent years when you hear something meowing you think it's just a cat talking in its own language - well, it isn't. It's actually the air entering the feline's buttocks, passing through its body and coming out its toe nail at the same time. It is actually quite rare to see/hear this occur. The cat just opens its mouth to disguise the secret of the 'meow'. Also it has been reported that meow is the form of a cat's 'emo side', its organs are depressed by the smallness of themselves so they cut the cats insides slowly killing them, that means the 'meow' is saying 'ouch me' or 'I'm sore' from the pain. Some people's theory is that cats are made to say meow by mind controlling ironing boards - personally, I think that's just silly! See also, Usenet Performance Artists.