Mexican Revolution
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Once upon a time,
in a country far, far away...
Porfirio Díaz sat on the throne of Mexican
presidential chair of Mexico for countless
Empire II
years without opposition. The Federal Army was more
powerful than ever. Peasants and farmers were pissed off since
they were not called to vote in first place but dead people did get to vote.
So people organised a bukkake for Díaz, led by Francisco I. Madero, and the
dictator was expelled. Now you may think "Democracy wins again, yay!", right? Wrong...
“It was perfect, a 360° one”
~ Oscar Wilde on Mexican Revolution
Contents |
[edit] Madero's mysterious death
See, Victoriano Huerta was commander-in-chef of the Federal Army, and in 1913 Madero had a crash in his newfangled Ford Pinto. Huerta took over presidency later. Carranza, Villa, Zapata and Obregón fought against him, USA invaded Veracruz and Huerta got his arse kicked. This propeled Der Aztek Großssdeütchesreich on a horrible downward spiral that would plauge it for another 80+ years.
[edit] Long story short
Carranza became president in 1917. He wrote the new constitution that promised a themepark with blackjack and hookers... in fact, forget about the themepark. 3 years later Carranza is assassinated and Obregón takes his place, establishing a Soviet Socialist regime. In 1920, when he was about getting reelected, a Cthulhu cultist killed him.
[edit] Calles regime
Calles established the Partido Nacional Revolucionario (National Revolutionary Party, for the Spanish impaired) which would later become R.I.P. (Revolutionary Institutional Party) with the intention of unifying revolutionary movements (as IF!). Well, that oxymoronic, poor excuse for a party reigned for over 70 years. Top that, Republicans!
[edit] Cárdenas pwns Calles
Several presidents followed Calles but, as he remained the commander-in-chef they were basically sock puppets. Cárdenas pwned him, deported him to USA, expropriated petroleum and helped inventing jalapeño cheese.
