Middle-earth
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Middle Earth is a land in the absolute center of the Earth. Even though there are some vague similarities (see map to the right), it should not be confused with Europe. Despite the lies (They're fucking LIES, goddamnit!) spread by the famous liar J.R.R. Tolkien that he viciously spreads over the Brie of time, Middle Earth is not Europe or anything like it.
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[edit] Etymology
The name comes from the American-Martian mydlerf, which literally translates to I ripped this off from Norse mythology or J.R Tolkien I cannot remember.
[edit] Geography
Middle Earth lies neither to the right, nor to the left, but is plainly, squarely in the... you guessed it, up. It is said to be populated by the angry souls of the defective crotch dumplings produced from the dank loins of fandom. Also there are trolls. And orcs.
It is more commonly known to the geeks on Wikipedia as the Earth's Core. How wrong they are. Only Apples have cores, douchebag! And Marines, they have a corps too...but don't say the "ps" or you sound like a douchebag!
[edit] Population
- Hobbit, all too many
- Elves, definitely too many
- Dorks, uhh I mean Orcs.
- Ants (they look like talking trees but, oh no, those are Ants)
- Ents (Walking trees... they are not called ants)
- Eyeballs
- People who Can Spell (Yoo mene tou tel mee whee kant spel?)
- Intellagent Elephants (You mean to tell me our elephants arn't intellagent?)
- Neopets, as many as you like. I can't count.
- Trolls, They lurk on the interweb deep in the misty servers and will pounce to feed on naivete.
- Tatermen, some kind of ghost or something.
- Turks, They use magic Hookahs to keep the forces of Mordor and Iran at bay. Have big noses and are frequently seen eating Shish Kabob.
- Nerds Dress up like elves and orcs in their grandmother's basement.
- Spartans They have a hobby of going around yelling at the Turks and Persian and kicking them into an oblivious ditch.
[edit] Middle Earth in Popular Culture
Middle Earth was first popularised in Peter Jackson's book the Lord of the Rings. Tolkien was then accused of plagiarism since he only copied it for his coursework.
Many inhabitants are offended when talking about The Lord of the Rings. Well, you live in a place that's hot like you ate liquid Chilli Con Carne and has weather worse than New Zealand and then someone comes along and says it's a lovely paradise? Even you'd think of them as a bit of a tard.
They regulary hold Boom Burning Festivals held by Stephen Hawking since he Kitten Huffed his way to Middle-earth. This is because his body kinda sporked itself through his own head, leading him to suddenly appear in Middle-earth.
