Mmm Deity Paradoxic Paradox

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“Thou shalt eat all gods but me.”

~ God on what his first commandment actually said.

“In America, Gud es inadible!!!”

~ (George Bush, on drugs, indignantly shoved his oar in too.)

“In Russia, Gods eats you!”

~ (Oscar Wilde on sexual relations with members of the Catholic Church)

The Mmm Deity Paradoxic Paradox (or MMMDPP (Mmm Deity Paradoxic Paradox), as it is known for short), is not a paradox, because it is true. However, it is a paradox, because it contradicts itself. It was invented in 2006 by an ignorant idiot who was highly educated and understanding of such complicated things sitting at a computer and typing random rubbish which had a very well-defined purpose. Then his friend copied it onto this Uncyclopedia page. Then, apparently, this page got huffed, and still doesn't exist. Damn those Americans!

1 The Paradox
2 Conclusion

[edit] The Paradox

[edit] 1. God is Food

Food is good and therefore good is food.
But God is good and therefore good is God.
If good is both food and God, then God is food.
In mathematical terms, the above can be written as and , therefore .

[edit] 2. Eating God

(N.B. The word "We" where used in this article refers to all humans in general... except the damn Mexicans)

God, as was stated above, is food.
Food is an edible thing.
We can eat edible things.
If God is food, food is edible and we can eat edible things, then we can eat God.

[edit] 3. We Are God

We, as stated above, can eat God.
But it is a long-proven fact that we are what we eat.
If we are what we eat and if we eat God, then we are God.

[edit] 4. We Know Everything

We, as stated above, are God.
But God knows everything.
If we are God, and God knows everything, then we know everything.

[edit] 5. The American Paradox

We, as stated above, know everything.
But everything includes everything in Australia, and therefore knowing everything includes knowing everything about Australia.
Therefore we know everything, including everything about Australia.
But "we", as stated at the beginning of sub-paragraph 2 (Eating God), refers to all humans in general, and all humans in general includes Americans.
If "we" includes Americans and we know everything about Australia, then Americans know everything about Australia.
However, it is a long-proven fact that Americans do NOT know much (let alone everything) about Australia, except for those idiotic stereotypes e.g. about kangaroos and koalas.
Therefore, Americans both DO and DO NOT know everything about Australia.

[edit] 6. The Closed Loop of Paradoxes

This creates a paradox, however this paradox has been proved true in this article.
This creates another paradox, however this paradox has also been proved true in the above point.
This creates another paradox, however this paradox has also been proved true in the above point.
And so, ad infinitum.