Museum
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
“Gotta love those Crack Shacks.”
~ Rick James on Museums
“I'm Rick James, bitch!”
~ Rick James on Always
Museums are crack/cocaine research facilities, disguised as holders of boring shit to show off.
[edit] Origin
The Museum originated in ancient Orlando, Florida. In 1969, Lil Gangsta built the first Museum (nick named crack shack by him). The first uses of the Museum were to mass produce crack/cocaine, and later on, it was used to research "mega crack", which would be much more powerful than regular crack. After getting busted for illegal drug production, many times, they decided to buy fossils and other items to show off in display cases to distract the police from what was going on downstairs.
[edit] Expansion
The Museum rapidly expanded around Florida, crackheads everywhere were jumping at the chance to work at these "Museums".Right so Florida became the drug capital of the world next to dexter ME. The Museum spread to Georgia, Alabama, these places are known as the boonies boondocks bum fuckin u got a perty mouth and then cousin fucker central , eventually all of the United Statesmostly Maine though. The drug rate had increased almost 100% since 1969 haha they said 69 lol, the creation of the Museum.
[edit] Present Day Museums
Present day Museums have gotten even more expensive items to display, to better cover up the illegal operations. The police never suspected a thing, they had no reason to either, who would suspect a "house of nerds" to be a "crack shack"? To this day, the most commonly known Museum (to crackheads) is the Orland Publice Museum, it is still a running crack facility, but only the finest crackheads are accepted to work there.
You might be thinking "why the fuck are there so many old people in museums?" This is because old people have nothing better to do with their lives than smoke lots and lots of crack.
People walk the floors of Museums everyday, but little do they know that illegal crack research facilities are only feet below them.
Even more dangerous are the Museums known as Museums of Fine Art. While seemingly innocent art museums these museums are a cover up for the most dangerous gang known to mankind. The initials MFA actually stand for Mutha Fuckas Alliance. All of these museums are headquarters of this dangerous gang, started by Johannes Gutenburg (Jay Jay Jordan) in 2873, and famous for such crimes as making the jews do 9/11, Watergate, and flushing Anna Nicole Smith's head down a toilet.
PLEASE NOTE: If you are not qualified, do not bother trying to become part of the MFA. Johannes Gutenburg is a dangerous man who will hunt you down and kill you. He knows where you live. He saw what you did there.
