New England Journal of Temporal Research

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

1 Overview
2 Notable Papers Published in the Journal
3 Subscriptions
4 See also

[edit] Overview

The New England Journal of Temporal Research is a quarterly journal based in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania that publishes a selection of academic and research papers concerning time travel.

Due to the Journal's unique submission system, there are no deadlines for papers. Rather, the Journal staff maintain a small "temporally displaced" drop box which appears in many time periods for a short while. Each edition of the Journal, therefore, not only collects a sample of papers from many fields of temporal research, but also sketches the developments of those investigations through time. This may sound like a lot of nonsense, but once you've had to deal with even the least confusing temporal paradox it will seem to be absolutely sensible by comparison.

[edit] Notable Papers Published in the Journal

"Time travel: An Examination of Underlying Principizzles" (1908) by Albert Einstein and Snoop Dogg.
"What if You Went Back in Time and Accidentally Had Sex With Your Grandma?" (1956) by Robert Heinlein.
"Okay, and what if you did it on purpose?" (1957) by Robert Heinlein.
"The Mystery of TARDIS: Why We Should Get Government Grants for Watching Dr. Who" (1993) by David O'Brien and Colin Radcliffe.
"What the hell is this TARDIS thing anyway?" (1998) by William Shatner.
"Screwing Around with Time: The Enthusiastic and Frankly Juvenile Temporal Exploits of My Colleagues" (2006) by Dr. Weisenheimer.
"Time Travel: An essay on the importance of planning" (2105) by Dr. Ernest Keller.

[edit] Subscriptions

The Journal (is/was/will be) a popular and well-respected publication with a circulation of at least 10,000 readers across twelve centuries. The annual rate is approximately $579 USD (in 2025 dollars, just before the start of the Machine War); however, the Journal maintains a trust fund account for future readers who would otherwise be disadvantaged by interest rates.