Nose-picking

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Nose-picking, or rhinotillexis (Greek, rhino "nose" + tillexis "habit of picking"), is the act of extracting mucus and/or foreign bodies from the nose, or adjusting the position of objects in the nose, like jewelry, with a finger or other object. This is an extremely common habit, with some surveys indicating that it is almost universal, with people picking their nose an average of about four times a day. It is a ritual that is done before anybody enters a toilet in the morning to go to work. Nose-pickers are often called "pointers" in modern slang. In the past, it was regarded as disgusting and led to social isolation, but in recent years civil rights groups have sought to make nose-picking as sexy. In the 2002 Olympic Committee Meeting, several officials are going for the idea of having this ritual as an official olympic sport. ^[1]

The mucous membranes constantly produce wet mucus that is exposed to the air. Once dried, the mucus typically causes a sensation of irritation that leads to the compulsion to dislodge the itch via rhinotillexis. Extreme nose picking resulting in severe nasal trauma is termed rhinotillexomania (etymology: Greek, rhino "nose" + tillexis "habit of picking" + mania) and may be caused by Obsessive Compulsive Disorder or Body Dysmorphic Disorder.^[2]

Although a very common habit, it is a mildly taboo subject in most cultures. While nose picking appears to be an almost universal practice amongst humans, the observation of the activity in another commonly provokes mixed feelings of disgust and amusement^[3]. The earliest record of nose picking comes from ancient Egypt, ca. 1330 BC, where a papyrus scroll found by the eminent archaeologist Dr. Wilbur Leakey details the financial payment of three heads of cattle, and food and lodging, to Tutankhamen's personal nose picker.^[4] A 1995 study into nose picking requesting information from 1000 randomly selected adults gathered 254 respondents. It defined nose picking as "the insertion of a finger (or other object) into the nose with the intention of removing dried nasal secretions. Of those who responded, 91% were current nose pickers (but only 75% of these believed everyone did it) and 2 people spent between 15 to 30 minutes and 1 to >2 hours a day picking their nose.^[5]

Nose-picking may carry a number of medical risks, thus most doctors recommend against it and encourage the use of a tissue instead. Risks include nasal infections, occasional nosebleeds (in 25% of those who pick their nose)^[1] and in rare cases perforation of the nasal septum (self-induced ethmoidectomy).^[6] Nose picking, however, should not affect the sense of smell, as the nasal cavity where the olfactory nerves are located are too high up to reach. Also, due to the special nature of the blood supply to the nose and surrounding area, it is possible for retrograde infections from the nasal area to spread to the brain, although this scenario is unlikely to arise from normal rhinotillexis. For this reason, the area from the corners of the mouth to the bridge of the nose, including the nose and maxilla, is known to doctors as the "danger triangle of the face." One doctor, Dr. Friedrich Bischinger of Austria, claims that nose-picking, combined with nasal mucus eating, may benefit the immune system.^[7]

[edit] Execution

Taken from the Book of Rituals 10:3 to 10:8
After waking up, pointers should have a one minute silence on the edge of his bed. The pointer shall slowly lift his hand to the nose. After that he should gently, place his index finger into the nostril in which he shall moan loudly. So loud that the aftermath would be disastrous. Sometimes this moan sounds very similar to the moan you hear during an orgasm.

[edit] Aftermath

Taken from the Book of Rituals 4:50 to 4:???
Glass panels nearby shall break into pieces.

[edit] Pointer Politics

Pointers were once ostracized and shunned by society. Lately, however, they have been embraced as living an "alternative lifestyle" by more liberal groups. Meanwhile, conservative groups have stepped up their opposition to nose-picking, encouraging the public to boycot Pointer-themed movies and television shows and even calling for a ban on Pointer Marriages.

The problem is made more complex by that fact that while most Americans are totally disgusted by the idea of nose-picking, they don't see the harm in a person picking their own or others' noses in private. This led to loud arguments as to whether marraiges were public or private (including those where the members picked one another's noses to exchange bodily fluids instead of kissing). Civil rights groups insist that those that object to nose-picking are being too Puritanical and old-fashioned, and that if they really long for the "good old days," they should move to Pennsylvania and become Amish, or to Alabama and become a redneck. Several have taken this advice, but more to be away from the civil rights groups than from the Pointers.

[edit] Pointer Pride Parades

Pointers have organized several Pointer Pride Parades (often on St. Patrick's Day, in honor of green, their favorite color). The most famous of these are held in Boston and San Francisco, where Pointers wear lots of nose jewelry, Groucho Marx glasses, and other nose-enhancing paraphernalia to enhance the prominence of their noses. Despite the success of these rallies, it is quite see people discourage their children from picking their noses.

[edit] Fundamentalist Response to Pointers

Fundamentalist Churches have issued strong words against pointers, claiming that nose-picking is a sin and that unrepentant pointers are going to get a free ticket to Hell. Many former pointers have come forward and publicly denounced nose-picking, claiming that nose-picking is a choice, and a sinful one at that. Pointer-rights groups counter that some children are born with a natural tendency to pick their nose. Christian scientists dismiss this, noting that no animals in nature pick their nose. Other Christian groups have been more open to pointers, noting that God made everyone different, and that they are all beautiful. Even Michael Jackson.

Some more extreme Churches, like the Westboro Baptist Church, claim that all of America is going straight to Hell without even a God-presided show-trial because of pointers. They point to the fact that there hasn't been a law that we shoot anyone that picks their nose on sight in over 50 years as a sign that we are "losing touch with God." The church adopted this policy because they believe that anyone who has ever picked their nose is an eternally damned sinner with no hope of salvation, because God just isn't that powerful. It has been said that this Church has created more Atheists than Pat Robertson, but it is doubted that that is even possible. While they are devout in their beliefs, they are often ignored and despised by the rest of America.

[edit] Pointer Trivia

Consumption of certain food items will affect the taste of mucous. Known agents include cayenne pepper, garlic, and Cap'n Crunch cereal.

Adults, ages 18-55, who use prosthetic hands, point 72% less frequently than able handed counterparts.

Contrary to popular belief, use of fingernail polish provides no health risks to pointers. However, pointers with recent (<45 minutes) polish applications commonly complain of an unsavory, bitter taste.

Adults with nose-rings tend to suffer from anxiety disorders at three times the rate of the normal adult population. Empirical research from the North American Rhinotillexis Consortium (NARC) suggests a relationship between reduced nose-picking and anxiety.

Timmy Brookman, from Juneau, Alaska, holds the record for largest mucous ball extraction: 3.2 ounces.

[edit] References

[edit] See also

• Hygiene
• Friend-Picking
• Cotton-Picking