Numbers
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“I hate Numbers.”
~ Beavis on Numbers
“Yeah, theres, like, too many of them.”
“I counted to infinity one time”
~ Chuck Norris on Infinity
Numbers were created by J.J. Abrams and Damon Lindelof in the late Spring of 2003, in order to keep track of their respective nun-bunting scores.
By all reliable accounts, the first numbers created were the sequence 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, and 42. Mathematicians worldwide praised the two television personalities for bringing focus to their thitherto meaningless lives. Andrew Wiles, professor at Princeton University, said of the invention "I can't believe they actually did it. They're so simple, so elegant.. ..I don't know what the hell we mathematicians have been doing this whole time."
When asked about the Numbers, Abrams commented:
- Really, we weren't thinking about any kind of practical use or application for our numerals. We just wanted to see what kind of garbage we could wring out of all the idiots who watch Lost, and how many more would believe the stuff they come up with. Folks are making up these crackpot ideas right and left, stuff that anyone with the least amount of literacy can tell is completely fabricated. And everyone else is like "Oooh, that's so cool, that's brilliant, it fits perfectly with the show!" I mean I think it's great that they think I'm brilliant, that's an added bonus of this gig. I just want to see the looks on their stupid faces when they realize we've been gaming them the whole time.
Following the smash hit sequence from Lost, numbers started to multiply, spreading to more mainstream areas of civilization. Soon there were such values as 2, 7, 8,675,309, and the elusive Number X. People started using the new numeric repertory to describe how many items groups consisted of, the value of goods and services on an arbitrary scale, and even the number of times they had sex with Paris Hilton's mother.
As of 2005 (formerly known as "somewhere about nowish"), only a year after the introduction of numbers, they are making major inroads into all areas of Western culture, and are projected to be Earth's dominant lifeform by the year 2017 (known until now only as "a really long-ass time away").
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[edit] Unsolved Problem of Existence of Numbers in Science Applications
It is open problem whether there are numbers in nature. Mathematicians say that the world is all about numbers but they can't prove it without the concept of numbers. Some people say that when one sees e.g. four balls there are the number 4 - actually they just say that there are at least two men with their balls. It is known that some people assume there may be numbers somewhere but no one haven't found them yet. Some claims that this is just a big conspiracy theory. Still all engineers keep using numbers as they make plans of bridges or houses. Would you buy a used bridge from engineer? I wouldn't.
[edit] Known Numbers
1
69
5
67
34
12
45201
345
42
99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999... (Yahoo knows the rest)
1.56
905
34.987
56
6
9
3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375105820974944592307816406286208998628034825342117067982148086513282306647093844609550582231725359408128 And a million billion trillion gazilion a google infinty more numbers
71
23
4545
7
2
3
2.1114
31337
1337
101
54
21
9001!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[edit] New Number System
In a few years time our old number system will be gone just like the wacky language we call Latin. This number system will take over almost all the numbers almost all over the world. It is called Absyssness (pronounced ab-sis-nes). These numbers are here: · Bidd (pronounced bid)= 0 · Gebidd (pronounced jee-bid)= 1 · Gelong (pronounced jee-long)= 2 · Copak (pronounced koh-pak)= 3 and everything above it · Mudd gebidd= -1 · Mudd gelong= -2 · Mudd copak= -3 and everything below it Mudd is the same as minus and pobb is the same as a decimal point ".". So learn Absyssness and you wont be left behind.
[edit] Magic Numbers
[edit] Formula for numbers
The numbers were made with the following formula discovered by Zachary Taylor in the secret wall society
You then get
and switch the numbers to letters you get
WALL
KILL BUSH!
[edit] The Really Amazing Thing About The Number 31
How does 31 differ from the following sequence:
4, 7, 12, 19, 27, 34?
4, 7, 12, 19, 27 and 34 all come with fried rice. 31 comes with chips.
[edit] Fun Facts
- The number 8 was banned by the Albanian (donald duck) goverment in 1992 for being too democratic.
- If you are inadept at mathematics, then looking at numbers could cause your head and buttocks to asplode.
- The society of the United Kingdom has had a long standing serious problem with numbers. So much so that now 5/4 of the population are beyond the concept of understanding fractions.
- The absolute highest number ever recorded in the alphabet was 999 bagizleons,which is 999 numbers over infinity.
[edit] See also
- Real Numbers
- 4-8-15-16-23-42
- 26
- 867-5309
- 2 line stories
- Million
- More than one
- Sextillion
- Eleventy billion
- Infinity
- The largest number
- Numbers of the Alphabet
- Complex numbers
- Numb3rs
- Negative numbers
- Anderson Number
- Oodles
[edit] Don't Bother With
- 9035768-It's pointless.
- 07798, There's nothing there.
- Fake Roman numerals. They'll mislead you into thinking you're looking at correct ones unless you look carefully and notice the differences.
