Pages with Links that Don't Lead to Where they Say They Do
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“This page just seems stupid!”
~ You on this page's questionable intelligence
“Shut your gob!”
~ The Author on unappreciative critics
“What's the point in a link if it won't go where it says it will?”
~ Oscar Wilde on links that don't go where they should
“Ruh Roh Rhaggy!”
~ Scooby Doo on this article
“I can has good link?”
~ Ninja Kow on futile requests
Uncyclopedian brothers and sisters, falsehood abounds! Are you aware of it!? Then heed my words carefully. There are many kinds of links that don't go to where they should go.
Contents |
[edit] Kinds of Links That Don't Go Where They Should
You must always be careful of links that don't go where they should go. Some are terribly dangerous! Here is a comprehensive list of the kinds of links that don't go where they should go.
[edit] Links That Go to the Wrong Page of the Site They're On
As the name implies, some links go to a misleading page of the site they're on. These are fairly common on Uncyclopedia, but even more so in Encyclopedia Dramatica, where satirical authors enjoy misleading their readers with links that may go from "Paris Hilton" to "butthurt." Only a truly sophisticated mind can comprehend the subtlety involved in such humor. A few subcategories:
- Pages where links redirect to clever references to the current article.
- Pages where links go to the opposite of what they imply they go to.
- Pages where the links don't really go anywhere at all.
- Pages where the destination of the link is irrelevant and makes absolutely no sense.
[edit] Multiple Paper Anchors When You Get Them Tangled Up
People say I'm crazy for using pages attached to chains as anchors, but have they ever counted the number of manatees killed by sinking anchors every year? They only say I'm not an environmentalist because I drive a Hummer and I use the expensive gasoline and I took out the pollution filter to let it make a cooler sound, but I don't see them doing us a favor!
[edit] How to Protect Yourself From Pages with Links that Don't Lead to Where They Say They Do
But I'm sure you're wondering, how do I protect myself from such horrid things as Pages with Links that Don't Lead to Where they Say They Do? Well <insert name here>, I'll tell you a few ways I discovered in the past that help me avoid the dangers of Pages with Links that Don't Lead to Where they Say They Do. Bring a gun too, preferably a big one.
[edit] Know Thy Enemy
You must learn how the minds of the creators work! I can't tell you everything myself, but here are some of the co-inventors of Pages with Links that Don't Lead to Where they Say They Do:
[edit] Do Not Click on the Links
Here's the hard part kids, DO NOT CLICK ON THE DAMN LINKS. No, I don't care that they may have candy. No, not for porn either! You're hopeless <insert name here>, you know that? Give me the damn mouse. Dumbass...
[edit] Kill the Authors
Alright, this is where that gun I told you to bring comes in. What? You didn't bring it? This isn't even worth my time! The article you need is User:Gunny/HowTo:Win a gunfight without a gun. I'm gonna go chill out.
[edit] One LSD-laced Chocolate Bar Later
OK, I'm back. Alright, I'm sure you can kill them with your bare hands. If that doesn't work, put me in your will and I'll use your resources to continue your struggle. Good Luck!
