Paleontology

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

Paleonthology is the belief that God created the world out of dinosaur bones.

Nooooooooooooooooo Its the study of fossils

[edit] History of Paleonthology

Paleonthology was founded by Roger Sperry in 1802, immediately after the invention of the time machine. Using complex empirical studies, Sperry managed to prove his theories three days before he actually conceived it.

Dr. Sperry travelled back in time to before the Big Bang and observed dinosaurs roaming the Cyclopean wheelchair which existed before space and time. Sperry thereafter observed the Hand of God striking down the dinosaurs and building the world.

The theory of Paleonthology is highly scientific because Professor Sperry re-did the experiment 69 times, which led to there being 69 professors simultaneously observing the Hand of God. Since Sperry by no means had enough cash to bribe 68 other professors, we can only assume that they were impartial and that paleonthology is scientifically proven.

Following Sperry's experiment came another famous scientist, namely King Kamehameha of Hawaii. Kamehameha managed to prove that if you charge up your chi high enough and shout your name loud enough, you can kill dinosaurs by merely blowing up nuclear weapons in their face.

Modern philosophy assumes that God has access to quite a lot of nuclear weapons, since George Bush does, and therefore Kamehameha's theory reinforces Sperry's proof of Paleonthology.