Preteen slut

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WARNING: As this article deals frankly with historical material about child pornography and prostitution, it may contain descriptions that could upset overly sensitive people who don’t like history.

I came, I saw, I wrote a book.

~ Preteen Slut Author Minnie Rae on Preteen Slut

I did it all on the good ship Lollipop.

~ Shirley Temple on Preteen Slut

If they had this stuff when I was a kid, I might have grown up normal.

~ Oscar Wilde on Preteen Slut
Photo of the preteen prostitute Minnie Rae when she was pregnant at age 8 or 9 or 10. 11?
Photo of the preteen prostitute Minnie Rae when she was pregnant at age 8 or 9 or 10. 11?

The Preteen Slut film series is generally regarded as the second greatest child porn series in cinematographical history (second only to “Little Rascals,” aka “Spanky’s Our Gang Bang.”) Based on a 19th Century book by preteen prostitute Minnie Rae, this work expanded into movies, television, the Internet, and the private collections of law enforcement officers everywhere.

Contents

[edit] Preteen Slut: The Books

The original book My Life as a Child Prostitute: The Autobiography of Minnie Rae or Preteen Slut was written by the young San Francisco harlot Minnie Rae, and published by North American Press in 1860. The 12-year-old’s autobiography was used during the American Civil War by President Abraham Lincoln to encourage the loyal Northern troops. Historian Charles Manson (writing under the penname Reverend Loveshade) described it as “reminding the soldiers of what they were fighting for.”

It was also distributed using a system known as the “Underground Railroad,” which smuggled copies of the book to the rebellious Southern troops. This was intended to break their morale. As Southern Civil War General Robert E. “Spike” Lee remarked in 1865, “That damn book was a terrible blow. My men began to question why they were fighting to preserve black preteen sex slaves when those in the North had much lighter skin.” (Note that due to the dedicated work of such 1960s black leaders as Martin Luther King Jr., Malcolm X, and John F. Kennedy, they all got shot. But thanks to their work, black preteen sluts are now nearly as accepted in the South as are Asian ones. Of course every true Southern Bigot knows white ones are a whole lot better).

The book is noted for its frank discussion of the life of a preteen prostitute. In intimate detail, Minnie Rae describes her encounters with major historical figures including General U. S. Grant, General Steve “Stonewall” Jackson, and the entire state of "Virginia". The book is a must-read for Civil War historians, primarily because it contains lots and lots of dirty pictures.

Several sequels followed, which featured Minnie Rae under various names engaged in a variety of sex acts. These appearances included Alice in Alice's Adventures in Wonderland (girl-rabbit bestiality, girl-queen lesbianism, group sex-tea party); Wendy in Peter Pan and Wendy (girl-boy band orgy, girl-boy-pirate pederasty, girl-boy-fairy mile high club); Dorothy in The Wonderful Wizard of Oz (girl-aunt and uncle incest, girl-farmhand groping, girl-lion bestiality, girl-life sized doll scarescrow sex, girl-robot tinman sex; girl-woman witchy lesbianism); and Alice, Dorothy and Wendy in Lost Girls (everything else).

[edit] Preteen Slut on Radio

The book was never aired on radio because radio doesn’t have pictures. It is important to note, however, the Howard Stern radio show constantly revives interest in the preteen sluts. This is Sirius business.

[edit] Preteen Slut: The Movies

This is the most successful form of Preteen Slut, other than the girls themselves. So far, it includes several successful films (and even more bombs), some of which are described below. (The rating system used ranges from **** meaning excellent, to * meaning this sucks, which is also good).

Publicity poster for Preteen Slut: The Motion Picture or The Birth of a Nation, showing Minnie Rae giving birth to America. This a colorized version: censors whitened the skins of black, yellow and red Americans.
Publicity poster for Preteen Slut: The Motion Picture or The Birth of a Nation, showing Minnie Rae giving birth to America. This a colorized version: censors whitened the skins of black, yellow and red Americans.

1. Preteen Slut: The Motion Picture (1915). **** The first of the film series starred Minnie Rae portraying herself, although for some unknown reason her character was renamed Lillian Gish. Still 12 years old, the preteen prostitute was directed by cinema pioneer D. W. Griffith in what is still considered to be one of the greatest, and most controversial, child porn films in all of cinematography history. This black and white silent film features Minnie Rae engaged in copulatory acts with people of various colors and creeds, including members of the Ku Klux Klan and the NAACP. It is sometimes said to be the first film portraying the Civil War and Reconstruction that spoke against racial discrimination. Because it features a montage of Minnie Rae giving birth to the resulting offspring, the movie is sometimes known as The Birth of a Nation.

2. Preteen Slut II: The Good Ship Lollipop (1934) ***1/2 This black and white film, directed by famed comedy director Cecil B. DeMille, starred the 6-year-old tap panty dancer and singer Shirley Temple. Ironically, she almost wasn’t cast because she was believed too young for the role. (She had begun her career earlier that year playing “Curly Top” in the soft core movie escapade “Out All Night.”) This entry had nothing to do with the first film of the Preteen Slut series, other than the title. Shirley co-starred with male prostitute Charlie Chaplin, the pair playing a Victorian street urchin and her homeless uncle who sing, dance and perform sex acts for bread and candy. The famous bath tub scene where Shirley pretends Charlie’s male member is a lollipop is regarded as one of the greatest moments in cinema. Shirley received a special Oscar for Child Pornography for her work in several films that year, and remains the youngest starlet to ever receive one. (Note that it was in this film that Charlie Chaplin was first called “Sugar Daddy,” and Shirley earned the affectionate nickname “The Little Tramp.” The movie was colorized in 1997 and released with a new soundtrack under the name Lolita.

2.5 Preteen Slut II 1/2: The Bad Seed (1956). **1/2 Directed by Mervyn LeRoy, this color film was the first true sequel of the series (which is why it’s numbered 2 1/2). It starred Patty McCormack as the 10-year-old daughter of Chaplin and Temple, who in this film are strangely called the founders of Western religion. In one of the most violent and sillier plotlines of the series, Patty plays a girl who inherited an evil mutant gene created when her parents were soliciting Japanese businessmen in August of 1945. This genetic deviancy causes her to castrate and then execute her clients while screaming “Godzilla!”

3. Preteen Slut III: Taxi Driver (1976). *** Martin Scorsese’s first major child porn film, it starred Jodie Foster as the 12-year-old prostitute Easy who picks up customers and services them while driving around New York City. An otherwise excellent entry, it disappoints because the sex scenes in the cab are too dark to pick out much detail. Notable primarily because the character of Easy inspired Robert “Hinkley” De Niro’s real life assassination of President Ronald Reagan.

4. Preteen Slut IV: Pretty Baby (1978). *** Directed by Louis Malle, this is the film that popularized the most successful child porn star before the discovery of Britney Spears, Brooke Shields. As this story of a 12-year-old New Orleans prostitute who marries an older photographer in the World War I era is a real movie and so is this description, we’ll move on.

?. Mina Ray (1987). **** A "documentery" about Minnie Rae. In this film, her name is modernized to "Mina Ray" and she lives in Las Vegas circa 1985. The plot consists of 12-year old Mina Ray being forced to have sex with her brother, running away from home, becoming a prostitute, and discovering a crashed alien spaceship, and then having sex with everyone aboard. The film would be terrible, but almost 45 minutes of the movie's 2 hour length was made up of Mina falling in love with a sexy alien girl, and then using the spaceship's technology to give herself a penis, and then fucking the sexy alien in every way possible. It was made by the creators of the Preteen Slut series (Preteen Slut Studios) and is listed here because of this.

?. Preteen Slut Porn Legend (1995). ****1/2 Even though it isn't part of the real story of the Preteen Slut series, it is the best Preteen Slut movie ever made, because all it is is 4 DVDs (For a total of 20 hours of footage) of a huge amount of preteen sluts fucking eachother. If that isn't what makes a movie an instant clasic, then I don't know what does. It's signature scene was when two of the girls pushed a crowd of preteen sluts into a pool of mud in the jungle, one of the girls eat a fruit that made her grow a cock, and then a tiger came by, and started to suck her cock, a sexual act which foury-year-old perverts call fellatio.

5. Preteen Slut Episode V: Attack of the Clowns (2002) ** (The film was originally released as Preteen Slut Episode II: Buttsluts Go Nuts V. Director George Lucas likes mixing up titles, and also can’t keep his numbers straight). In a confusing sequel to the fourth film, Natalie Portman recreates Brooke Shield’s character, only 10 years later as the spaced-out Transsexual Queen of Naboobie--but still age 12. Natalie’s character Petme falls in love while performing anal intercourse with the supposedly young Anal-kin Skywalker. Anal-kin is being trained in sexual techniques by Obi “Ben Wa Balls” Kenobi (playing himself), and the martial arts master Yoda (played by Pat Morita). Probably the only truly good scene in the movie features Yoda and Christopher Lee, as Count Dookie, in a battle where they wield their penises. Otherwise, the film is filled with stale dialogue and endless repetition. In one scene, Dookie tells Anal-kin the movie’s entire plot while the queen anally services an army of clowns. Anal-kin is supposedly Petme’s 12-year-old twin brother, but was actually played by Natalie’s aging father, hip hop artist Ronald McDonald. The movie was an attempt to revive his career. The attempt, and the movie, failed.

6. Preteen Slut Episode VI: Revenge of the Cesspool (2005) ** (Originally released as Preteen Slut Episode II: Buttsluts Go Nuts VI, and later on DVD as Preteen Slut VI: The Undiscovered Cunt-Tree). I don’t know how to describe this, because I never saw it.

7. Preteen Slut VII: The Pedophile Trap (2006) * At this point, the series became completely confusing. This film was actually pieced together from several earlier films out of chronological order. These include ‘’The Parent Trap’’ (1998) starring Lindsey Lohan as 11-year-old twins; ‘’The Parent Trap’’ (1961) starring Hayley Mills as the 11-year-old twins; ‘’My Girl’’ (1991) starring Macaulay Culkin and Anna Chlumsky as the preteen parents of Dan Ackroyd; ‘’The Wizard of Oz’’ (1939) starring Judy Garland and subtitled “ Dorothy and Toto Do the Midgets;” several home movies and videotapes of the backstage antics of one of the most popular preteen sluts, The Mickey Mouse League star Britney Spears with Justin Timberlake (1989 to 1994); and 23 movies starring the Olsen Twins (1997 to 1997).

8. Preteen Slut: Girls Night Out (2008) ??? Since this movie isn't out yet, it cannot be rated, as said by George W. Bush. This film will be about lesbians.

(We won’t list any other movies in the series, because some of the stars are still underage).

[edit] Preteen Slut on Television

While TV has been filled with preteen sluts since “Fellatio Starlett Theatre” or Uncle Miltie’s Play House (1948 - 1953), which was later revived by Pee Wee Herman, only a handful of series are regarded as official Preteen Slut Rip-offs. These are Lost in Space (1965 - 1968, which starred Will and Penny Robinson as a loving brother and sister, and which some claim was the actual inspiration for movies V and VI); The Brady Bunch (1969 - 1974, which starred The Brady Bunch); and any television series with the word “family” in the title.

[edit] Preteen Slut on the Internet

You know it......
You know it......

As a search for preteen slut on any search engine (other than Yahoo) will yield over 12 billion hits, we won’t bother listing any sites.

[edit] Preteen Slut in the Future

The future of the series is in grave doubt due to increasing controversy over its content. As one anonymous critic said, "Watching hour after hour of preteen girls engaged in explicit physical acts is disgusting. When on earth are they going to stop promoting this trash, and start showing more films featuring preteen boys?"

[edit] See Also

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