Prose

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"Prose Before Hoes"
-William Shakespeare

Prose is a lot like poetry, only it doesn't scan or rhyme. Much of what masquerades as teenage poetry is in fact prose, tortured into stanzas, and offers an excellent justification for the position that pens should not be given to anybody under the age of twenty-five. An example follows.

Oh Laura, babe

Whyfore will you not love me? My loins are

Hot for your sweet loving. You torture my

Soul. The thought of your sweet fingertips trickling down the

Seams of my

Clothing is more than I can

Bear. I think I will take a shower now.

Oscar Wilde, aged nearly seventeen

Many people think prose should be taken more seriously than poetry, and is a more intellectual and challenging forum in which to present ideas, poetry being soppy. This is wrong, as any fule kno, and its downright wrongness can be proved quite simply by picking up any of the works of James Joyce. For an example of how prose can, under the correct circumstances be utterly glorious, give Tom Clancy a go.