Pwned

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You may be looking for Pwn (disambiguation) and not even know it!

You may be looking for Served and not even know it!

“If you had to look it up, you're stupid. Oh, PWNED!”

~ Oscar Wilde on the correct use of the word 'Pwned'

“We have confirmed the existence of Weapons of mass pwnage in Iraq, n00b.”

~ George W. Bush on pwnage

“I PWNED YOUR ASS,n00b!!”

~ Ben 10 on video game pwning

“PWNED!!!”

~ Urinatingtree on everything

“Point. Click. Pwn.”

~ Secret Korean pwnage Strategy

“I came, I saw, I pwned.”

~ Julius Caesar

Contents 1 Pwned, What is it?!? 2 Variations 2.1 Pwnsome 2.2 Fatality 2.3 Pwnage 3 Pwnophobia 4 Other variations 5 What you should do when you are PWND 6 See also 7 Links

[edit] Pwned, What is it?!?

You! Nah, I'm joking but according to Wikipedia...

“Pwned, also typed as Pwnd or Pwnd! is a phrase used to describe the act performed by an elite group of pawn shop owners as they take everything you own that exists in three dimensions. However, the fourth dimension, time, remains unscathed and thus you would spend an eternity possessionless. This phrase is often used as a codeword by Nigerian scammers.”

~ Wikipedia on Pwned

[edit] Variations

[edit] Pwnsome

Pathetic internet gamers mistakenly believe that pwnsome is a hybrid of ‘pwn’ and ‘awesome,’ generally used to describe things that are pretty damn awesome, and pwn at the same time. They also believe that originated from a misspelling during an AIM conversation between two members of the Find Your God forums, and is widely used on www.findyourgod.forumsplace.com , though virtually unknown elsewhere.

In fact, 'pwnsome' is actually a contraction of 'pathetic loser who is lonesome', which is a perfect description of most gamers..

[edit] Fatality

It's not pwning, it's just getting your ass totally whipped by that Asian dude you're jealous of. You don't get me? Then...

Now you see, never mess with asian men. They play fighting games, AND they know "kung fu". SUCK THAT REDSTONE AND RPGS!

[edit] Pwnage

You! after I kick your ass at Halo! No, but seriously now. Pwnage is what happens to a person who isn't very good at something and they get thrashed like the Nazis in WW2. Okay, bad example I grant you but it gets the general message across. It actually all comes down to this equation.

Understand?

No?

Then you just got pwned by this section on Pwnage. (fucktard)

[edit] Pwnophobia

Fear of getting your ass handed to you on a video game. As feared by: Christopher Martin (UK), professional rent boy, most noted for his fear of a shotgun to the face (Halo 3), (Fear also British children and their anoying voices). Easily depicted side-effects include mild bruising, wetting the bed, increased Pwnage (either Pwnophobia, or you just suck REALLY bad), pregnancy, or the overwhelming desire to cover every thing you eat in mounds of salt. 'Thy shalt not be pwned or incite pwnophobia' was famously removed from the final draft of Moses' Ten Commandments, being replaced by 'thou shalt not kill'.

[edit] Other variations

There are also other derivatives such as C0ned, droned, loaned, boned, mediowned, RobertDoaned, Daniel Booned, and AlCapwned. Another late comer to this new list is eatatthedoaned. No other phrase has made such a profoundly retarded impact upon our youth today. Due to this entirely stupid new reality, one can expect to see things such as pidill, noner, and filmerguiset describing things like ice cream, condoms, and dish soap respectively.

[edit] What you should do when you are PWND

Firstly, do not panic, to be Pwned is quite a serious matter. Think of it as a level 4 serving. To be Pwned is to be dominated by an opponent, possibly sexually. Once underway, there is no way to stop the Pwnage process there are however many ways to recover from it. Such things include getting laid (noted below), GETTING ON YOUR LV 70 ALT AND KICKING THE CRAP OUT OF THE PWNER (one of the most COMMONLY missed forms of recovery), make a sock puppet play of you pwning your pwner (just for psychological reasons), or one of the less preferred tactics, bathe in garlic or onions. If none of these tactics work for you or you are unable to put them into action, work to find whatever you can that will relieve you of your Pwnage, before time runs out and you are considered a noob on every last server there is in the game. But whatever you do, don't give up, since you will then fall into a pit of endless pwnage, meaning every game you play, wether it be an MMORPG, RPG, Single Player,Board Game, or a so-incredibly-easy-that-you-possibly-just-cant-be-pwned game, you WILL get your ass handed to you on a platter.

Edit:There is only one way to prevent being laughed at post-pwned. Get Laid. None of your friends have scored on anything but that FPS or RPG you play in your bedroom with the curtains closed. If you have a female/male then your friends will bow down to you and you will technically pwn them in the real world.

[edit] See also

• leet speak
• Pwn
• Pwnage
• OWNED
• Cazed
• N00b
• jim bean-master of a pwnage art: moshy bashing
• Josh Masat-master of being pwned
• Christopher Martin (UK) - the original pwnophobiac
• The Queen famous for pwning French president Nicolas Sarkozy at WWE Smackdown 2008 during his recent state visit to the UK.

[edit] Links

• Pwnd