Ricky Gervais
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“Hahahahhaahaa!Hahaha!Oh my! He said "a disabled!"”
~ The Great British Public on Ricky Gervais
“Absolutely Flabulous.”
~ Ricky Gervais on himself
“And I say "Yeah..what have you ever done on the telly?". ”
~ David Brent on Ricky Gervais
“Get off the stage! You're shitting yourself!”
~ 90,000 fans at Wembley at the Diana Concert on Ricky Gervais
“None Of Us thing Your funny So Just....Beat it Beat it Just Beat it”
~ Micheal jackson and kids on Ricky Gervais
“I actually think I could be a director, because I have Jude Law's number”
~ Ricky Gervais on thinking he can be a director because he has Jude Law's number
“Who? What?”
~ Oscar Wilde on Ricky Gervais
Ricky Gervais (born June 25, 1993 - 1976) [[Bith Place}} A street corner abandoned by parents]] is the alter ego of Regional Paper Sales Manager for Wernham-Hogg, David Brent.He is also an English comic book writer and performer from Reading, Berkshire, England. He grew up in Reading, Berkshire, on a council estate and is now a millionare - not bad, eh? Gervais achieved mainstream fame with his award-winning BBC2 television programme The Office, in which he was credited as co-writer and co-director, with a "Stephen Merchant". The truth of the matter is that the name Stephen Merchant is a pseudonym and in fact, Gervais wrote and directed it all. Besides single-handedly writing and directing his award winning show, Gervais created the lead role of David Brent and gave himself the funniest lines. He even did a funny dance. In 2005, Gervais returned to BBC Television with his new sitcom, Extras which was a whore-pounding success even more so than The Office. In 2006, Gervais became the first guest star on Family Guy to also write an episode, "Peter Griffen, This Is Your Wife", which aired March 26, 2006. Ronnie Corbett never did that and now he is dead, so he never will.
Ricky Gervais is credited by many as being the funniest man alive, but in all fairness that doesn't really do him justice. He is also funnier than a lot of dead people too, including Ronnie Barker (he is funnier than Ronnie Corbett as well, but that goes without saying).
In July 2006., Gervais married his long-time partner Jonathan Ross, much to Stephen Merchant's dismay.
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[edit] Background
Gervais's father is of Québécois descent and grew up in Quebec, Canada so that explains where Ricky gets his exotic good looks from. Raised as the youngest of four children surrounded by council-house scum in Reading, Ricky Gervais has described his childhood as "normal". He is no longer in touch with any of his family, as they have been avoiding any contact since he managed the 80's band Suede.
His surname is actually pronounced Hervaid. It is spelt that way too. Unless you're American, in which case it's 'Gervis'. Apparently.
Gervais received his early education at Reading's Ashmead School and he is their most famous ex-pupil; he probably always will be. He then went on to University College London (where loveable cartoon character Mahatma Gandhi also apparently, allegedly, supposedly was seen nearby at one point in one of the episodes of children's show Gandhi's Sandy Sandal) in 1979 to study biology, later switching to philosophy where he graduated with a 2:2. If they had done degrees in making people laugh and doing funny dances, Gervais would almost certainly have ended up with a first. In fact, he would have taught the course. Gervais left university to be the lead singer of the New Romantic group Seona Funny-Dancing. The group released two singles which became a massive hit in the Philippines in 1985: "Bitter Heart (She's In A Wheelchair!)", and "More To Lose (Unlike This Chap Here!)". He could have made it big in Britain too, but in all seriousness, he preferred it in the Philippines. The weather's better, the sex is cheaper and Manilla is a fucking funny name for a city (remember Manilla envelopes?). Gervais gave up his talented music career to follow and early dream and become an award-winning comedy writer and performer with two top rated sitcoms and three stand up tours under his rather generously proportioned belt.
[edit] The 11 O'Clock Show
Gervais got his first regular TV exposure in this weekly Channel 4 show, effectively ruining it. On the 5th of May 2000, the Central Electricity Generating Board registered a huge spike in demand, as if millions of people of people had suddenly put the kettle on. This cause a temporary glitch in supply across the land causing a number of people connected to life support machines to die. The cause was traced to Gervais' second appearance on the show, causing the viewing public to rise on mass to leave the room and make a cup of tea.
Gervais honed his acting skills over subsequent appearances and by the end had perfected his manor of looking at somebody/the camera, then looking away briefly and adding "yeah" to the end of every 2nd sentence. He also hit upon the idea that he can make money out of making sexist and racist remarks by saying he was being ironic. As 95% of the public have no idea what that means and are sexist or racist (or both) anyway and the liberal arts correspondents swallowed this line the public took Ricky to their heart as their chosen purveyor of offensive jokes after the death of Bernard Manning.
[edit] The Office
The Office (UK)
The first, six-episode series of The Office aired in the UK in July[1] 2001 to little fanfare or attention, but repeats, bullying, and DVDs helped spread the word, building up huge "momentum" and "anticipation" for the second series, also made up of six episodes, in September 2002. The second series topped the BBC2 ratings with 10.8m viewers, and the show then switched to the larger BBC1 channel in December 2003 for its final two special episodes. These Christmas specials, with an introduction by the Queen, were watched by 19.2 billion people worldwide, most of whom were Ricky Gervais in his alter ego form, since his alter egos (including Ricky Gervais, David Brent, Andy Millman, Stephen Merchant, Karl Pilkington, Robert De Niro and Colonel Walter E. Kurtz) make up about 63.7% of the world's population.
Gervais won countless awards and praise and earned enough money to give up working altogether. But he was too talented to stop. From now on he will probably give up all his future-earnings to charity, albeit in a rather smug and questionable way.
[edit] Extras
A six-episode sitcom about extras working on movies. Contrary to popular belief, Gervais intended for Andy Millman to be blatantly derivative of David Brent, and this is thus not a valid criticism of the show. Written and directed by Ricky Gervais and "Stephen Merchant" (if you rearrange the letters in that name you get Ricky Gervais). Aired in the UK in July 2005 and the US in September 2005. A second series was broadcast in 2006 to wide disappointment. Gervais himself did not take part; he now considers himself too big a star for mere television. Big names who have appearing in Extras include Brad Pitt, Julia Roberts, George W Bush, Albert the Hamster, and John Lennon. The show's catchphrase "are you having a laugh? is he having a laugh?!" was mildly popular. In a Gallup poll, 2.65% of viewers have actually had a laugh while watching Extras. The other 87.35% are Ricky Gervais's alter egoes (including Tony Blair, Sid Waddell, Ferdy the Fence, Bertram Pincus, Clive Meadows and Keyser Soze), who make up about 63.7% of the world's population and cannot laugh Gervais's ridiculously trademark laugh at fear of being exposed.
[edit] Stand-up
Gervais also toured the known universe in 2003 with his stand-up comedy show Anuses. The Political Anuses tour then followed a year later. Both of these shows weren't recorded for release on DVD and television broadcast because Gervais is too mean and, besides, you should have bloody gone and seen them. The third part of the themed live trilogy, Famous Anus, isn't happening. You don't deserve it. You can't afford it, and if you want to be able to, do what Ricky Gervais has done. What's that? Oh, fuck off, he was born in Reading for Christ's sake!
[edit] Books
Gervais released a children's book in 2004, entitled Flans, a humourous look at invented types of cheesy baked tart. After the success of this book, he released its sequel More Flans in 2005. I don't see Michael J Fox doing that. You know why? Because all you'd get is a wobbly scribbly mess and who wants to read that? Stephen Hawking?
[edit] Healing the Sick and Lame
Gervais has also received accolades for his work healing the sick and lame, which he does with the power of his magic hands. Jesus was supposed to do that but I don't see him doing it now. He just gets some mad old Mississippi vicars who've had too much sherry to do it. Gervais doesn't heal everyone who needs it, though, as he needs them for jokes. And wheelchair manufacturers will always need customers. He's actually more economically practical than Jesus was, and has shorter hair.
[edit] Podcasts
Starting in late 2005, Gervais, Merchant and Karl Pilkington have starred in a series of podcasts. These podcasts are so popular that everyone in the civilised world has heard them. Now, thanks to Gervais' pro-active spirit[2] even people in wartorn or uncivilised parts of the world are hearing them too as he has arranged for helicopters armed with Marshall amps to hover over Brazilian rainforests and Congolese warzones blaring out Pilkington failing to understand how a dishwasher works. Ever seen Apocalypse Now? Now imagine the Flight of the Valkiryies Scene with Wagner replaced by Gervais's cackling, sound barrier breaking laugh and Pilkington saying "I could eat a nob at night" over and over again. That's the reality.
[edit] Artistic Integrity
Gervais has a good reputation of having great artistic integrity, caused by his constant mentioning of it. In a recent interview with The News of the World he said "We don't like to milk a project or exploit something we've created". There are three Flanimals books and The Office has been sold to most of the world's countries. I hear those podcasts aren't as free as they used to be too. Oh, and he started an Ameican version of The Office too, starring the thick one from Anchorman. That's successful now, and makes alot of money. Royalties, anyone?
[edit] Allegations Of Slave Ownership
In early 2004, around 10 months after "The Office" Christmas specials had been filmed, The Sun newspaper reported that Gervais had bought Halifax figure head Howard Brown from the bank's head office. The Sun reported that the pair had met whilst filming the show, and Gervais had requested that Brown be kept in a box until he was needed for the scene. Disgusted, the production team refused the request so Gervais purchased Mr Brown from Halifax and now keeps him in a chest of drawers in his front room at his house in London. The charity S.L.U.T. (Slavery and Labourer United Tacklers)claim that Gervais is not a slave owner, because he's "just so mother-fucking rich."
In April 2007, Gervais denied tabloid reports that police had found Alan Driscoll, lead signer of techno band thewomb, chained up in his lounge.
[edit] 2007 Fuck-Fight With Stephen Merchant
On 23rd April 2007 an Extras script meeting with co-writer Stephen Merchant led to a twat-brawl style fight, lasting 19 hours and finishing in Trafalgar Square, London. It has been reported by The Times that the fight had sparked as Gervais had wanted to murder Extras guest star Dustin Hoffman in the middle of the show for ironic effect, whereas Merchant wanted to brutally beat him to near death and call him a "method-acting bitch-flap". The fight broke out when Gervais threw his very own Howard Brown at Merchant, followed by the drawers that Brown lived in. The fight ended when Gervais accidentally penetrated Merchant's anus after pulling down his trousers as, "part of the fight". Dustin Hoffman is actually Al Pacino, who is the same person as Michael Corleone, who is in fact one of Ricky Gervais's alter ego's (along with Chris Martin, Martin Gibb, Wayne Rooney and Bob Dole), coincidentally.
[edit] Awful Nose Bleed
Unfortunately, on the 46th Smackral 200005, Gervais suffered a slightly bad nose bleed. Although controlled with drugs such as 'Harp's Medicated Treatmentzzz' Gervais never really got over the loss of nazal blood. Dripping on his PJs, Rickforth stumbled into the bathroom and reached for the toilet paper. Desperately remembering that the curry he had experienced exiting his rear depository had caused all the useful wiping device to be used. The nose bleed eventually stopped around 2 minutes after, but damages to carpets and clothes-wear added up to a total cost of £6, leaving Gervais £6 worse off than before. Interestingly, this cycle is experienced every 6 years by Leonard Nimoy(famous comedy juggler), however, damages are calculated in US $s not GB £s due to the difference in country. In any case, it was a dark day for about 63.7% of the world's population.
[edit] Accolades
Most people agree Gervais is funnier than anyone or anything else they know or watch on television or go to the cinema to see. Including Jim Carey and gang rape
In 2003, Gervais was listed in The Observer as the funniest man to have ever lived. Although this is a bold statement, as there may have been very funny cavemen who we've never heard of, it is most probably true.
In a 2005 poll to find The Comedian's Comedian, other comedians said nice things about him and he featured in the poll. He didn't come out top because they weren't as nice as they could have been. Because they are jealous. Of his success.
Gervais has received a plethora of awards for his work on The Office, most notably two Golden Showers (both just for the show, your English funny is that good!), as well as a veritable roomful of British Academy Television Awards, British Comedy Awards, Titles, Imperial Crowns and Sainthoods amongst others. His rise in the USA is largely attributed to his hilarious funny dance.
On March 15, 2006, it was announced that Gervais would receive an honorary award at the annual Arse d'Lick ceremony in Switzerland on April 29. The award is given to "An exception beacon of humanity who has improved life on Earth through their art". Simon Pegg doesn't have one of these and probably never will.
The public has voted Gervais "Insincere Smile of the Year" every year from 2001 until the end of civilization for many years dedication to looking smug whilst showing his teeth as an impression of smiling. The previous winner Cherie Blair was only too happy to be rid of the acolade. Here are some examples of his winning entries
These are only a selection of the accoldaes Gervais has received. If he listed them all there would not be space on this website to talk about anyone else.
[edit] Target of fraud
A gang of criminals stole £200,000,000 from his bank account (approximately 000000.1% of Gervais's total savings) by pasting a picture of some shaved buttocks onto a dead man's passport and using an insider from the bank to transfer the funds. When they tried to use the money to buy The Office DVDs, they were apprehended by police officers, and subsequently arrested. They were later sentenced to between thirteen and thirteen and a half years in prison. One of them, Herbert C. Fudgepacker (Ricky Gervais's alter ego), was pushing sixty so he will probably not make it out alive. He hopes Gervais is happy.
[edit] Trivia
- Gervais is a great athlete.
- Gervais suffers from carregoitis. A degenerative condition which causes those effected to become increasingly similar to Jimmy Carr
- Thanks to Ricky Gervais we can all laugh at disabled people again, under the protective veil of "irony"
- Ricky Gervais has three separate entries on the Sex Offenders Register.
- Gervais is funny but sometimes (uncommonly/occasionally/sometimes/often/always/never/not never/nevernever/nevernever land/is) up his own arse
- Gervais makes up 63.7% of the population
- No one has ever seen Gervais and Karl Pilkington in the same room...only heard....
[edit] Footnotes
- ↑ Gervais is currently lobbying to have this month renamed "Gervalius" in his honour. He argues that "Julius Caesar, whilst important to dusty old historians, doesn't have two hit sitcoms under his belt and a Golden Globe. Additionally, I think you'll find Flanimals has more fans than Commentaries on the Gallic War"
- ↑ Ego
[edit] External links
- RickyGervais.com Official Site
- Interview with John Humphrys
