Rockport, Texas
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Rockport, Texas is probably the greatest coastal town in all of Aransas County. It is a great place for old people.
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[edit] Local History
Rockport was founded in 1491 by Christopher Columbus, a year before he sailed to that one island in the Caribbean. Rockport grew to become a huge cultural center for Latin America. In fact, it was once so great that it was up for bids to become the new capital of the United States of America in 1776. Unfortunately, however, Texas had not yet been admitted as a state, so it technically wasn't actually in the US, which, in the words George Washington, was a "Bummer". By 1850, the population had grown to roughly 100 billion. It was estimated, though, that 95% of the residents were actually illegal aliens. To much dismay, the population dropped significantly after the terrible Hurricane of 1873.
[edit] God's Vacation Spot
A fun fact that many people do not know about Rockport is that God visits the town during the two week vacation that He takes every June. He has been known to visit the Beach, go fishing, and drink pina coladas with the locals. Amen.
[edit] Wal*Mart & H-E-B
As God loves Rockport, He blessed the town with both a Walmart and H-E-B, which got rid of all those pesky small businesses.
[edit] Amusement in Rockport
The Chamber of Commerce, being the only real authority in Rockport compiled a list of 51 Approved Things to Do in Rockport. Here are a few of those exciting things:
- 32) Beachcombing - Walk along the beach and find sea shells.
- 34) Canal subdivisions - Drive to see areas such as Key Allegro, Harbor Oaks, City By The Sea, Palm Harbor, Holiday Beach, Bahia Bay, Copano Ridge and others.
- 47) Bingo - During the winter months, the game of Bingo can be played at different places almost every night of the week and some year-round!
[edit] Rockport-Fulton High School
Rockport-Fulton High School is the learning center of the community for students aged 14-37. The school cafeteria is also the birthplace of Martha Stewart. Home of the Pirates, RFHS competes in the Intergalactic Sports Convention. Athletic teams at Rockport include:
Popular courses offered include underwater basket weaving, Armenian history, and poledancing.
Famous alumni include Playboy playmate Tilde "Tequila" Smith.
