Rope

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The information contained in this article is dangerous.

Do not try this at home, kids; go over to a friend's house.

Here comes the noose to end all your pain!

“Colonel Mustard in the Conservatory with the rope”

~ Cludeo on Murder

“Quick, Use Rope!”

~ D&D Skills list

A rope is a common birthday gift for those with suicidal tendencies but are yet too young to buy a rifle. The rope is in its most dangerous (or helpful, depending on what your outlook on life is or how many antidepressants you took this morning) when it is in noose form (see image on right).

In case you've got a real thick neck.

Michael Jackson has many imaginative uses for rope.

[edit] 101 Uses for rope

1. Suicide
2. Murder
3. Roping
4. Bondage
5. Tying down tarps
6. scare the fucking hell out of esther
7. Knowing the difference between 7 and 101
8. You Have To Burn The Rope - also known as YHTBTR by Freaks

[edit] How to hang yourself

1. First make sure you are depressed. This can help you tell:

my mood ring

average reading active not under great stress

2. Make a noose. (I don't know how! What do you think i am? some kind of faggy depressed kid?)

3. Stand on a stool with noose around neck.

4. Jump off stool.

Congratulations! You are dead!

[edit] iRope

iRope, the worlds most popular life taking device

Along with the new generation of iPods, which are targeted at teenagers, Apple has released the iRope, aimed at emos. A very similar product is expected from Microsoft in the close future.

[edit] Decline in Popularity

The realization that a tie can be substituted for rope in a noose lead to lowered rope purchases in 2006

Sadly the rope has seen a decline in use as it has been discovered that many other items can be used in suicide instead and they don't prickle your neck as much.

[edit] See Also

• Suicide