Rudolph the Red-Nosed Hitler

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Rudolph the Red-Nosed Hitler was Adolph Hitler's brother. He was born on February 33rd the day yo' mama got served. A gene mutation caused Rudolph the Red nose Hitler a glowing red nose. However abnormally red, the nose was good for several reasons including it made Rudolph look more elegant when marching and glowed beautifully in the dark to attract the women. Rudolph the Red Nose Hitler has been known for trespassing, illegal mass backyard grazing and eating out people's gardens. The police went Rudolph Hunting ,they failed as they were fighting a guerrilla warfare with the man, an unbelievably awesome tactic. Rudolph tactics such as the Surprise Buttings and Butt Kicks were extremely effective the latter being more apprehensive. The Rudolph Hunt lasted for 17 months until Rudolph the Red Nose Hitler was nearly frozen to death while taking a bath. Rudolph the Red Nose Hitler was caught and later sentenced to be whipped-in-the-butt for his several offenses. Thereafter Rudolph the Red Nose Hitler was released and retreated into the depth of Sumeria.

[edit] His life at Sumeria

In Sumeria Rudolph the Red nose Hitler adapted to the life of the Sumerians. He settled in the city of Sumer where he lived a rather harsh life. He lived on as much as 5 coins per day and only ate when necessary, on the brink of death. Rudolph tried to get a job but was rejected, deemed as dorky and muscularly challenged. The man struggled to get a job,took time happy slapping Sumerians and eventually landed as a contemporary lantern at the Street of Elmo district. He was popular for warning the cars when they neared a corner. He eventually quit due to extreme butt-achedom and joined the laudromat.

He was given the opportunity to learn the many Sumerian languages of Sumeria including Gae , Sumo and Summer, which has no connections to Sami. Rudolph became a poet, who wrote poems about sex, mushrooms, Cheating on Wife and hunks. The up-the-pants poet was at first well received by the Sumerians due to the fact that his topics were influential on the believes of the people. They later came to know that the poems were discriminating their past leaders and shunned the poet. Failing to be a poet Rudolph the red nose Hitler enlisted into the Sumerian army. In the army he was known to be successfully and extraordinarily fit, setting the Army record of 629 crotch Lunges in one hour. He was also tops at the Barynya dancing (where they squat and kick there legs out), bum lunges, goose hops, arm ups and hopping. He was recruited to fight the Gunboat war against Hittia, and was skilled at firing from moving gunboats, as well as using the Panzerfausts and giving AIDS. He was seen dancing naked with his troops on boats, these dances were known as the Schizophrenic (where they go all crazy like Nirvana) dance. He received the Sumerian medal of honor, by shooting down the Flying Desert Tiger with nothing but a Panzerfaust. For his Schizophrenism and showboating, he received the Red Circle for as well as the Medal of Schizophrenism for giving AIDS to the Hittites.

[edit] His Death

Rudolph the Red Nose Hitler In the Army (Portrait)

Rudolph was walking along the street when he saw silly dogs humping. The dogs did not like him to see and so they chased him and nearly bit his butt off. Rudolph wandered one day into the wilderness due to insatiable sexual appetite and/or curiosity. The next day he wandered into the savanna and he saw two elephants that were idolising their parents by making love like their parents, the young elephants were ashamed and they did not like the feeling of being ashamed and so tried to stampede him to death. Although Rudolph had nearly died of being stomped, his fitness had helped him again. He was able to duck, fuck, cluster-fuck, leap, jump,hop and lunge, while humping away. The next day he came across the limpopo river where the snake lived. The curious reigndeer asked the snake what it ate. The snake said "come closer so you can hear what I say". So Rudolph went nearer, but too near that it was thus eaten alive by the great python. He then fucked his way out of the snake to see your mom. The ENDDDDDDDD. your a pot head.

[edit] His Song

"Rudolph, the Red-nosed Hitler, Had some very "curious" views, And if you ever heard him, You would know he hates the jews,

All of the other Germans, used to laugh and call him names They never let poor Hitler play in any German games.

Then one foggy Christmas eve Satan came to say: "Hitler with your nose so bright, won't you kill the jews tonight?"

Then all his followers loved him as they shouted out with glee, Rudolph, the red-nosed hitler, you'll go down in listerine!"