San Marino
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San Marino is a dot positioned in the middle of Italy. Somehow these folks got it into their head that they're too good for Italy just because some fricking stonemason was persecuted by the Roman Empire. What a bunch of selfish jerks.
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| Motto: Libertas- "We have a castle, and you don't" | |||||
| Anthem: We're San Marinoans, and We're From San Marino and we have a castle! | |||||
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| Capital | San Marino | ||||
| Largest city | San Marino | ||||
| Official languages | San Marinoan, Sindarin, Fricking Gibberish | ||||
| Government | Fricking republic | ||||
| National Hero(es) | Marinus of Rab | ||||
| Declaration of Formation | 301 A.D., by a fricking stonemason | ||||
| Currency | Italy's money | ||||
| Religion | Stonemasonry | ||||
| Population | 3 | ||||
| Major exports | Nothing | ||||
| Major imports | Everything besides their fricking castles | ||||
| Favourite pastime | Hyping their nation | ||||
“Oh, the mirth! Pitoresque indeed.â€
~ Oscar Wilde on San Marino
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[edit] Origin of Name
The guy who founded it was called Marinus, which just goes to show that these people are so retarded they can't even remember their fricking founder's name. And where the hell did the fricking "San" come from? God, some people. The Marinoans or whatever have a real problem with names. Fricking people call their presidents (two at a time, can you believe it?) "Captains Regent". What a bunch of fricking bull. What kind of mideival shit is that?
[edit] History
San Marino was founded by a fricking stonemason who ran away because the Roman Empire was mean to him. What a wimp. I wonder how the Marinoans have any sense of national pride? The only redeeming quality they have is that they are "the oldest existing constitutional republic", which nobody outside San Marino probably gives two shits about. They are also the "smallest country or other jurisdiction participating in European football competitions". Wow! I'm impressed. Why the hell does anybody care about the size of countries participating in European soccer competitons? You can play, that's great. Now piss off.
Some people believe that Marius, from Ann Rice's novel of "The Queen of the Damned" founded San Marino and that the name was just mininterpretted. Yeah, shows how much they know. Probably some punk or goth drop-outs.
[edit] Geography
San Marino consists of nine towns on nine hills. That's it. It's frickin' tiny. They're unlucky. Russia has all of Siberia, and it only uses it for mining, shaman rituals, and exiling capitalists. They should take it over. Too bad San Marino's army is about three people (as opposed to Leichtenstein's one-man army). They could still probably take on the USA with ease though, as the Marinoan crossbowman don't really do 'friendly fire' incidents, something which the US military frickin' excel in. Furthermore, the US has a history of losing to frickin' tiny places (Cuba, Vietnam, Iraq, Starbucks) so a loss to San Marino is frickin' likely. Since the marinoans are too proud of living in a tiny castle-republic, they've decided not to take over France, whose army already had surrendered to San Marino. One Marino marine said: "It'd be too easy for us to conquer France, but we like our village, so we just slept with their women and took all the wine and cheese"
[edit] Notable Marinoans
Other than "Dan", there are no notable Marinos, apart from their nice girls. San Marinese girls speak Italian and look just as sexy as Italian girls, which is pretty hot. However, if you marry a San Marinese girl, you will be able to be domiciled in San Marino for tax purposes and benefit from big tax breaks.
[edit] Sport
San Marino are particularly known for their crap record at football.They only won 1 game in history.They only had ONE GOAL (an own goal).There only win was a 1-0 win over Liechtenstein when Mario Frick scored an own goal, but it was claimed by Andy Selva...Who then got run over by Idenfons Lima...and Your dads Corvette
Europa 
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