Scenester
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“A vintage scenester made my Anna orgasm so hard, she bit off my mole.”
~ Enrique Iglesias on Scenester
“I'm not scene, I'm a chav, innit. *Peace out*”
~ Ana, scene wannabe on Scenester
[edit] Scenester
Scenesters (pronounced "ob-nox-ios dumb-shits") are just emo kids with brighter colours and less cuts, really. They seem to believe that the world owes them something, usually in the form of [1.8k+] on MySpace.
To define a scenester, let's start off with a bit of a shopping list:
- Too much eyeliner. Usually tapered to a point at the edges of the eyes, so that it goes halfway down their nose and looks fucking ridiculous.
- Eyeshadow, usually two or more colours blended together.
- Skinny jeans and studded belts, not unlike emo kids. They have a tendency to criss-cross hot pink 80's-style belts across their hips and wear ridiculous puffy tutus over their jeans to escape the 'emo' similarities, but sorry kids, emos do that too.
-iPods with Hello Kitty cases blasting out Alexisonfire and other 'mint' bands with phrases for names that nobody's ever heard of. Usually better defined as 'noise' than 'music'.
-Finding Nemo or Care Bears back packs, because apparently looking like a childish retard is trendy.
-More fluorescent colours than a satellite map.
-A habit of chalking their MySpace and Livejournal URLs on public streets.
- A penchant for stripes, stars, polka dots, ♥, "&&", semicolons, hoodies, the word "rad", handguns, the sound effects "BANG BANG", "RAWR", "BEEP BEEP" and any combinations of those, the 'word' "kthx", dinosaurs, robots, and anything "retro".
[edit] Internet Disease
100% of scene kids have a MySpace, and 99.9% have a LiveJournal. They have a bad habit of switching Livejournal names every two weeks, when "______sxe_sex__" gets old. Fortunately those with at least 100 friends on MySpace don't change accounts all too often, because they tend to lose more than 70 per cent of those friends.
A typical MySpace bulletin consists of "new photosssss. pc4pc, fuckupss. xoxo you know i love you, bangbabes. [[[:&♥;", and a LiveJournal post is either pretty much the same thing, or pissy songs ripped off Panic At The Disco's lyrics.
But no matter what the title is, most of the bullshit-ins will always contain bullshit like "repost this 1,000,000,000,000,0000 times in the next 10 minutes or some clown with a knife will rape your mum at midnight".
Most scene kids have AIM or MSN, with stupid screen names like 'trendy miracle', which they certainly aren't. MSN display names are usually something along the lines of ___x. the nightmare before [LiANA] _ &&iloveyoukassierawr<33;;
Usually, most scene kids will attempt to get with every boy/girl that has ever connected to the internet. In modern society, these people are called W-H-O-R-E-S.


