Scmiillicettittisinndamorghning

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“There is no outbreak of scmiillicettittisinndamorghning here in Baghdad!”

~ Iraqi Information Minister Muhammed Saeed al-Sahaf

Scmiillicettittisinndamorghning, also known as the "Topless Disease", is a disease, frequently referred to by the abbreviated title of "millititties" is

I don't know, show me your breasts.

Scmiillicettittisinndamorghning BALLS ARE PROPER MASSIVE!

Alternately, you could simply attempt to dress yourself in the morning. If you succeed, you do not have millititties. If you fail to dress yourself due to your swollen, turgid breasts and sweaty, punctual nipples; you probably have this disease. If you fail for other reasons, you should seek immediate assistance from a health professional. Assuming, of course, that you can even manage that. If not, the human body takes several days to expire from dehydration, hunger and exposure. Good luck.

[edit] Treatment

Doctors recommend going topless and applying a salve made from curdled goat's milk. While this does nothing to reduce the tenderness or inflammation, it does promote the recycling of spoiled goat's milk and saves space in landfills. Doctors often promote eco-friendly lifestyles.

There is no cure and also no effective treatment currently available for this disease, sorry. But scientists are researching a link between scmillicettittisinndamorghning and nipple clamp useage. One Dutch study implied a direct correlation between the number of hours several tiny nipple clamps were used on the delicate nipples of lab mice and the onset of millititties symptoms.