Sex Change

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Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

~ David Bowie on Sex Changes

Lord help me. I can't chai-ia-ia-ia-ia-ia-iang

~ Lynyrd Skynyrd on Sex Changes

Sex Change is attainable after having sex with vending machines. It is still practiced today, although the numbers are decreasing due to new desexed automatic sucking slots. These were designed intentionally for the purpose of stopping malicious vending machine acts that have become a rising problem in the United States today.

Although it is impossible to receive sex change in the United States today, other countries such as Japan and Germany still have sex changeable machines.

[edit] What machines to collect Sex Change from

The best machines to get sex change from are the ones that have the little cans that look similar to the figure below:

             __________
            |          |
            |   coke   }
            |__________|


Another great machine to collect a sex change from is below:

          __________________
         |     |  _______   |
         |     | |condoms|  |  ______ Screw here
         |     |  -------   | /
         |     |            |/
         |     |         ||_/_________ Sex Change collected here
         |     |            /
         |     |   ______  /|
         |     |  |______|  |
         |_ ___|____________|

[edit] Dangerous machines

Although most machines are perfectly safe to receive some change from, there are also dangerous ones to watch out for.


Here is the most dangerous machine in the world to receive sex change:

        _________________________________________  
       |            _________________            |
       |           |   DANCE  DANCE   |          |
       |           |    REVOLUTION    |          |
       |           |_____EXTREME______|          |
       |                                         |
       |                                         |
       |         _______________________         |
       |        |           |           |        |
       |        |  < \//\ > |  < \//\ > |        |
       |        |           |           |        |
       |        |  <      > |  <      > |        |
       |        |      /\   |      /\   |        |
       |        |    \/     |    \/     |        |
       |        |         > |         > |        |
       |        |      /\   |      /\   |        |
       |        |__<________|__<________|        |
       |                                         |
       |                                         |
       |                                         |   _____No screwing here!
       |_________________________________________|  /
       |                    |             _________/
       |        ___         |        ___ /       |    __Screw carefully in these slots!
       |       {___}        |       {___}        |   /
       |      /             |                    |  /
       |     /              |       || ||__________/
       |    No screwing     |       __ __        |
       |                    |      |__|__|___________
       |                    |                    |   \
       |____________________|____________________|    \___Change collected here

[edit] Sex Change tips

In order to receive optimum sex change results, it is recommended that you do the following:

  1. Spank the machine
  2. Grope the machine
  3. Be rough with the machine
  4. Talk dirty to the machine
  5. Passionately lick the machine
  6. Rub the machine's HDMI port
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