Sixth International

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The Sixth International is or was an international socialist organisation which claims the heritage of the Second, Third, Fourth and Fifth Internationals, while considering that the members of each were irrevocably liberal, centrist splitters. It does not recognise The First International as it considers its official name, the International Workingmen's Association, phallocentric.

The main body of the Sixth International split from the Fifth International some time before it was founded, objecting to its leadership's delaying tactics in recognising their faction, the "League to Destroy the Fifth International".

When founded, the group claimed three members, one each in Milton Keynes, Stamfordshire and the Gilbert and Sullivan Islands. However, its Stamfordshire section (known as the Stamford Worker's Party) was disaffiliated when they were found to have skipped its stringent admission requirements, which insisted that each member must have read the entire output of Marx, Lenin, Mao and Hoxha in the original tongues, have mastered sumo to Olympic standard and be able to recite the complete lyrics to Mmm-Bop by Hanson. The Stamfordshire section soon came to see an opening to the proletariat in local pigeon racing clubs, and undertook a long-term entrist strategy, disguised as a collared dove.

Within a month of the Stamfordshire split, the two remaining sections agreed to hold the Founding Conference in Milton Keynes. The Gilbert and Sullivan Islands section was unable to find the venue, and promptly left the international, writing a famous polemic, Well, you started it.

Both sections continued to refer to each other as the official Sixth International, while giving their own groups increasingly elaborate names. The Milton Keynes section is now known as the "Sixth International (Marxist-Leninist-Maoist-Hoxhaist) (Provisional Central Committee)", and now bases its ideology on the thoughts of Pol Pot and Margaret Thatcher, calling for intellectuals to be sold shares in the countryside and forced to march to the Conservative Party Conference.

The Gilbert and Sullivan Islands section calls itself the "World International League for the International Redistribution of the Assets of the Sixth International (Gilbert and Sullivan Islands) International", its member said to be close to splitting with herself over the question of the orthodox pronunciation of "Boise".