Poetry
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| Poetry for people who hate poetry |
“Poetry is the art
of creating and maintaining
logical, ordered sets
of data that can be used
as instructions for an information-reading device
to handle and reform
the read information
to even more informatic written
information.”
“Roses are
red,
violets
are too.
In Soviet Russia,
poem
writes YOU!”
~ Russian reversal on poetry
“In the case
of many poets,
the most important thing
for them to do...
is to write
as little
as possible.”
~ T.S.Eliot on Everyone who ever wrote a poem
“Genuine poetry must
be
understood before
it
can
communicate.”
~ T.S.Eliot on Why poetry doesn't make any sense
It is an art of writing using diction, caesura, figurative language, and large amounts of illegal drugs (like marijuana and opium). Unlike writing prose or comedy, writing poetry does not include forethought or revision. Poetry is often written with the intention of attracting girls.
Some notable poets are William Shakespeare (recently confirmed to have truly been a woman), Robert Frost, Homer, Oscar Wilde, John Milton, Lord Byron, John Keats and the anti-Pam Ayres (theorically proven to exist somewhere as the greatest and most tradgicly overlooked poet the world has ever known). Livejournals have become the mecca for contemporary poetry.
Anything written about poetry is purely speculative since nobody ever reads it. Poetry blows.
[edit] Some examples
Iambic Pentamter:
Some examples here for you to see
Of contemporary poetry:
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
All of my base,
Are belong to you
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
In Soviet Russia,
Poem writes YOU!!
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Come on baby,
Lets play Halo 2.
Roses are red,
Grass is green,
Come on baby,
Lets play Halo 3.
And this piece from the famous poet DJ Jazzy Jeff:
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Let's get some barbecue and get busy.
Roses are ummmmm...,
violets are well uhhhhhhh,
shut up and go make me a sandwich!
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Some poems rhyme
but this one doesnt.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Mr T says:
"I pity a foo'!"
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
It is pitch black.
You are likely to be eaten by a grue.
Roses are grey,
Violets are grey,
I'm color blind.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
Heil Hitler!!!
You stupid Jew.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
2+2=5
For extremely large values of two.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
....
Get back into the kitchen!
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I can't wait to run over you!!!
== Foreign language Poetry ==
Strange though it may seem, foreigners participate in Poetry too. Beautiful French, Spanish, Chinese and yes, even German Poetry has been recorded throughout the ages. Take this 19-th Century Lament for a requiem by Georg Vilhelm Friedrich Hegel
Ich bin so schrecklich müde.
Mir ist's ganz schwer ums Herz.
Ich träume von meiner Gertrude.
Ertrinkt in meinem Schmerz.
== The True Meaning of Poetry ==
Do not, under any circumstances, attempt to understand a poem. It is too difficult. You are likely to hurt yourself. This is not your fault -- it's the poet's. Most poets are depressed loners who think they are smarter than everyone else. But they just can't leave it at that can they? They have to parade it around as if they are, like, God or something. Jesus Christ. We all hate those "elitist" bastards.
Some people say that poetry is an embodiment of the finest, most noble thoughts human beings have ever had. Others suggest, 'go get me a beer, bitch, the football's on'.
== What Is Poetry for? ==
The poet, obviously! You didn't think it was for your enjoyment, did you?
There follows a list of reasons to write poetry:
1. You're very depressed.
2. You somehow believe that
carriage returns
are under
used in this society.
3. You're under the illusion that the rest of the world cares what you think enough to decode your 300 page epic on 'the decomposing of compost in a field' which is in some other world somehow supposed to correspond with something like death or memory or computer science or something at least worth thinking about oh god please let it be something that isn't compost decomposing in a field.
4. You're a Goth.
5. You're terminally depressed. See: sticking your head in an oven.
6. You hate all things good in life (eg. Jeff Metz)
7. You're under the influence of some type of drug (usually more than one) and (just for extra emphasis) you think that people care about you.
8. You THINK you're smart and want to show your "intelligence" off to the world that doesn't give a shit about what the fuck you wrote!
== Types of poetry==
===Haiku===
Haiku are too short
In which to describe poems
Of seventeen sounds
===Stupid Poetry===
Stupid poetry is what people with something to say do when they want to seem like they’re saying nothing. It is also what happens when people learn big words, and want to show them off in a "sensitive" and "thoughtful" way.
“Oh, oh, look at me! I have emotions! I want to comment on the world around me in order to change it! I think that the best way to do this is in the way that nobody can understand!”
~ Poets on Everything
Now to turn it into a poem.
Poette’s Lament
O, gaze upon me!
I feel
Yearning to remark
on the cage that is around me
in order: to amend it!
O, I shall reach my end through tongue incomprehensible!
Stupid poetry is not completely without point, however. Writing smart poetry carries great risk of death by lacerations, ingestion, poison, and concussions.
“
But intelligence is often the enemy of poetry, because it limits too much, and it elevates the poet to a sharp-edged throne where he forgets that ants could eat him or that a great arsenic lobster could fall suddenly on his head.”
~ Frederico Lorca on Survival of the Dimmest
===Stream of Consciousness===
Stream of consciousness is a type of poetry created by lazy people, and those just trying to be wierd.
A Stream of Consciousness
Wenbar wits bah ah
And the coyote man would NORTH SOUTH
ravage the beauty
makings
.e
EAST
apostrophe (NORTH)
-Anonymous
==See also==
- Artist
- Celibacy
- Doctor Zhivago
- Humosexual
- Loneliness
- Poetic justice
- Surav Ganguly
- Sonnet the Hedgehog
(Poetry is like the glittering pink ocean. It sounds beautiful and delectible, but you really have no idea what is going on. I mean, glittering pink ocean? WTF?)
