Soup
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“Like sake”
~ kk
“I have more soup than you!”
~ Rick Moranis
“I Like to eat soup, it reminds me of my penis”
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[edit] History
Soup was invented by soupy mc soupicus in 1992 as a hot molten Poop Cuisine drink that people could eat with a spoon. The first flavours designed for soup were, poop, tomato, cream of broccoli, cream of mushroom, cream of This Guy, creamin' clemen, and cream of Doodoo Sammich . The concept of Soup was picked up by a number of grocery stores including Safeway and enjoyed temporary success, but it was not to last. Soup first hit the shelves in the winter of 1994 in sewers, and people loved it because of its heating qualities and poopiness, but when summer rolled around, sales dramatically dropped, and Soup was banned from nearly all grocery stores due to fecal contamination. Safeway, being angry at Oscar Wilde for selling them such a terrible product, hired Jesus to smite his ass, Sadly Jesus failed to do so. soupy soupicus went into hiding, and took the recipes for the original soup flavours with him. This has lead to the great Soup/Salad Paradox.
[edit] Current Flavours
Although the delicious flavours of Cream of Broccoli, Cream of Mushroom and Tomato along with the nasty poop flavor are still lost to us, new flavours for soup have been invented and are starting to gain popularity in the black food market. Although the Safeway Gestapo and its Loony Tune allies continue to ban Soup, and its creator Oscar Wilde, all across the country, daring housewives are illegally home cooking new soups. The newest flavours to hit the underground include:
- Apple
- Snapple
- Corn
- Porn
- Hair
- Bear
- Weasel
- Diesel
- Cream of human ( La crême d'humain )
- Packing chips
- Campbell's Big Bowl-O'-Shame™
[edit] 'Souped up cars', literally
On May 15th, 2006 the CEO and Founder of Italian automakers Asinos'trano motors announced that it will be starting research on a gas alternative that consists of Golden Barley Soup with a little parsley. He also announced a line up of cars that will run on it:
- sesso con i pesci XT3242: A mid-sized sedan EST:$45,040USD
- costi a molto XG3423: A compact coupe EST:45,030USD
They are striving for at least 2 miles/ tablespoon at this point.
[edit] Soups Uncertain Future
Although one can only guess at the future of soup, it is safe to say that the evil Safeway Alliance will continue to destroy all oposition, including Soup. But soup is not without allies, famous persons such as Dr. Phil, Oprah, and the 18 man population of the Island of Bogota continue to lobby for soup's legality. Hopefully someday we can all enjoy soup without fear.
[edit] Etymology
Soup comes from the words slurpale (or suckable) and poop. Soup was originally made of poop.
[edit] ATTACK OF THE SOUP ANON
A long time ago, in a fbr_trash post far far away, one anon developed a strange craving for soup. But once she got her soup, she did not stop her crazed rampage. She became obsessed, forcing kind users to make her soup related videos and posting random videos she found on the internet of soup. She even went so far as to edit the Wikipedia page of soup with her crazed ramblings. Most everything she does is signed 'with love from soup anon', so be very very careful if you see this warning. You never know when she will strike again!
with love from soup anon <3
ILU FBR_T EVEN THOUGH I MAY QUITE POSSIBLY BE INSANE
