The South

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Dixieland
(Flag) (Coat of Arms)
Motto: States have rights to have rights to have the right to be a state with rights! State's Rights!
Anthem: "Sweet Home Alabama" by Lynyrd Skynyrd
Capital Mayberry, N.C.
Largest city New Orleans
Official languages Southern, Ebonics, Cajun.
Government Very very very very very Patriotic/Religious
President George W. Bush
Extinct
Area 1,995,392 km²
Population 9,103,332
Currency Negro
Time zone Southern
Internet TLD .cs
Calling code KKK

Mary Ann! Come look at this glowy bohx for a saycond, it's got werds n' pictures on it. Look at this typy stuff ahm doin' naw! It's puttin' all them words I be typin' onto the glowy parts! I saiiid, Jo Willa!!! Look at this glowy thingy that I see here! It's showin' me information and shit! I'm gonna show this to the pastor so's I can see if it gots demons in it! While we're doin' that, Annie Marybeth Sue can cook those 'coons I brought home fer supper. Chop chop, woman! I ain't got no time fer yer whinin'! Mabel Magnolia, where did ya put the baybah? I best not find him in the washin' machine agin', er you'll get a thumpin' ya won't soon ferget!

Contents

[edit] Histery a The American Sath

Sammie Jo! Now the glowy bocks is askin' me all sortsa questions aboot the histery of our grand state! Whell, seein' as how I types so good, I's gonna sees what I can cook up here.

  • 0 A.D.: Jesus, our undisputated lord and savior, came down to Arth to make America, followed closely by the Sath! STATES RAAGHTS!
  • 1776 A.D.: God himself, our lord and savior, came down to Texas to make the Sath a place where people's can be free! STATES RAAGHTS!
  • 1865 A.D.: Jesus and Satan he who shall not be named, fought to the deyath. Jesus reigned supreme-like for the next 1000 yeeers. STATES RAAGHTS!
  • 1972 A.D.: God and Jesus, our lords and saviors, came down to the Sath to write "Sweet Home Alabama" and create the mullet hairstile, the best song ever conceived by God or man, and the best hairstyle conceived. Ever. STATES RAAGHTS!
  • 2000 A.D.: Jesus and God battled Cthulhu, the demon representing Man's deepest nightmares, to elect George Jesus Bush as our God-Fearin' president. STATES RAAGHTS!
  • NAHADAYS: I jus' heard from Sally Ann's brother's uncle's cousin that Gloria Jean's half-sister just got hitched to Sheila's cousin's uncle's great grandfather by shotgun! I tried ta tell Lula Belle that it couldn't be true but I got drunk.
  • NAHADAYS: Scarlett jus' tol' me bout this new comediaaan. He's all makin' fun a us Satherners.

[edit] The Wo' Of Nawthun Agresshun!

Nah, I don' reckon on readin' them books the Yankees keep writin', but I know the American Revolution like the back o' mah hand. You want me to prove it? Okay, there's a mole in the middle, and it's kinda sunburned, and it's got them 5 fingers everyone's always talkin' bout and... oh wait, what?

[edit] Histery a The Narth

Blanche! Look a this here glowy box askin me bout the damn Yankees!

  • 0 A.D.: The Noth was invented right after they crucified Jesus, er lard n' savyer.
  • 1337 A.D.: Al Gore invents the interwebs, with all the tubes. Er, well, that's what Cindy Sue Delores says, anyways. Muhammad Jane Tallulah said he invented the environments after that, but she's an unholy liar... and a filthy whore!
  • NAHADAYS: Them Yankees 'r lordin' over us Suthern folk with their teeth and non-mobile houses! Forcin' us tah gay marry 'n take baths 'n pay taxes. STATES RAAGHTS!!
  • NAHADAYS: Billy Bob Betty Sue Leviticus Betty Jo said that the Sath is conspirin' tah rise again. She/He was raaghts! ...I mean raaght!

[edit] Fun Facts about the American The South

  • Every southern baby's first words are DAMN YANKEES!
  • 62% of southerners' daughters are also their half sisters.
  • Southerners love State's Rights.
  • While the state of Kentuckistan is known to have over four million residents, it only has five and a half last names.
  • The Democratic Party is legal in the South.
  • Marriage to your own br-uncle has only recently been legalized in the South.
  • There are things south of The South... like South America. Did I just blow your mind?
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