Spaghetti
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Spaghetti is a nice italian word for food that lazy ass, overweight Americans can eat at their leisure. Famous spaghetti concoctions include Spaghetti O's and Spaghetti Straps.
A man once had a dream that a mechanical rhino was about to eat everyone. All of a sudden, a great man stepped forward and announced, "Wait! I can save everyone." This man then proceeded to turn into a giant spaghetti string. From then on, he was known as Spaghetti. He is great.
Known by different names around the globe, spaghetti is the only food with the ability to cross the cultural barriers and enter into such unlikely cuisines as that of Japan, where it is referred to as Ramen, and Africa, where they call it "mealworms".
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[edit] History
Throughout history, spaghetti was grown on trees, which were planted in small pots. Originally, it was discoverd in Hungary, and it was a favorite type of food for the native residents (they were Hung(a)ry all the time). Over the course of several centuries, new types of spaghetti were developed, including the Spaghetti mentioned earlier, and 'wormaroni' which is a special breed of spaghetti tree.
Not only did the taste improve, the conditions needed for growing spaghetti were improved as well. Nowadays, most of the natural Spaghetti is grown in Liechtenstein. Switzerland and Austria are major producers as well. Andorra is a major spaghetti smuggling center.
Although they are quite similar in appearance, texture and taste, spaghetti and macaroni are totally unrelated. However, it is rumored that may have had some undocumented cross-pollination at one point.
[edit] Recipe
The recipe mentioned below is created to provide a syntethic version of the Spaghetti. Although it resembles the taste quite well, the best spaghetti in the world is still the natural one.
Feeds 85,000 normal people - or John Gooddickman
[edit] Ingredients
- 1 ball of string approximately the size of the Taj Mahal
- 1,000,000 eggs
- 100 55-gallon barrels of pasta sauce
- 50 lbs of salt
- 1,000,000 chicken nuggets
- essence of god
[edit] Method
- Take the eggs and beat well.*
- Now carefully remove all the bits of shell. Set them aside for use in another recipe.
- Add pound of salt.
- Soak string in egg.
- Leave string in direct sunlight for one week.
- Add sauce and enjoy!
- If beating is illegal in your country, a stern talking to will do.
[edit] Culture
Certain places in the world are culturally tied to spaghetti. Italy, Little Italy, and your Italian neighbour are most of these places. The cultural impact of spaghetti upon people is best reflected in the phrase "mamma mia!" Notably, this phrase has spilled out from Italio-centric cultures and into Mario games.
