Star Trak
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“Wheaton's work on the Star Trak manuscripts has to be one of the greatest literary achievements of last four-hundred years. Bravo Wil! Bravo!”
~ Oscar Wilde on Star Trak
Star Trak is an unpublished series of science fiction novels written by Wil Wheaton in 1937. Star Trak told the story of Anakin T. Picard and the evil Jedi Empire. The Star Trak series is comprised of 79 novels, consisting of nearly 20,000 pages, and another 50,000 pages of notes and other background materials. The books document the Star Trak universe, characters, historical events, theme songs, and interweaving plotlines spanning a 780 year timeline. The popular series Star Trek,Star Wars,Star Search, and Star Gate SG One are all derivative works heavily influenced by this work. Star Trak is itself in its entirety copied almost word-for-word from the late 1600's science fiction television series Stare Wars, although it does add some new elements, such as a storyline.
Most of the action sequences take place on trains, including the interstellar express. THe most renowned took place at the end of the two-part novel "Donkey Dong" in which Lieutenant Garth Maul attempted to transubstantiate a red panda into a hot piece of ass, but was caught with his pants down, both literally and figuratively, by the dad from Leave it to Beaver. The insuing battle has led millions of retards to mass suicide.
[edit] Destruction of Star Trak Manuscripts
The original Star Trak documents were eaten by George Lucas and Gene Roddenberry after they had made copies of the documents and locked them deep inside a secret vault hidden on a ranch in California. Once they had sole possession of the documents, Lucas and Roddenberry went on to release independent sections of the story to television and film. Wheaton, to this day, does not realize that his original masterwork was stolen and published. Many speculate he has been too busy writing in his journal and blog, while others suspect that his career in pornography has led to a lifestyle involving excessive drug use, causing him to attain a cosmic sort of spiritual enlightenment known as "Q." .
