Steve Blackman
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Steve Blackman (born September 28, 1963 in Annville, Pennsylvania) is a current wanted felon who best known for her lifelong career as "The Super Assasin Stingray Master". She was also a wrestler in the World Wrestling Federation (WWF), under the name of Doink the clown.
Contents |
[edit] Birth
Born to a black mother, Wooppie Goldburg, and black father, a Gorilla. Her parents were very suprised to find that their daughter, Steve Blackman, was infact a White Woman. They decided that they had 2 choices; Either change their last name to "Whitewoman" or through the use of plastic surgary turn their daughter into a "Blackman"...
[edit] Death
Steve Blackman died on September 29, 1963, aged only 1 day old. This was due to unforseen complications during plastic surgary. The doctors had sucesfully turned Steve black but had trouble turning her into a man when her, now black body, rejected the small penis they were trying to attach to her.
“We need a bigger penis!! This ain't gonna work!! HELP HELP!!! OH GOD NOOOO!!!!!”
~ The Doctor on Steve Blackmans Operation
“This penis aint big enough for my fucking black body! Id rather die than be a black man with a small wang!”
~ Steve Blackmans Body on The Small Penis being attached to it
The death hit The Blackman family hard and both Woopie and the Gorilla decided to seperate and despite recent counciling sessions, have still not got back together.
[edit] Resurrection
Unkown to his parents Steves body was dug up by The Choker, who through the use of choking resurrected her. The major of Steve's resurrection appearances are reported in the New Testament to have occurred after her death and burial and prior to her Ascension. Scholars refer to this period as "The Blackwoman era" As the resurrected steve was black but still wore makeup and dresses, indicating she was a woman.
The first thing Steve did once Resurrected was to take revenge upon The Doctor whos careless actions caused her death. He hunted down the doctor and a fight ensued on the streets of LA. After many rounds of fisty cuffs The Doctor seemed to gain the uper-hand and threw acid over Steve, causing her skin to go pale and her hair to go green. Steve crawled home to saftey.
[edit] Wrestling Career
The new pale skin and green hair inspired Steve to become a wrestler. All she needed was a name and after long thought she came up with "Doink The Clown", an anagram for oral sex...
Doink the clown was the first wrestler to hold the WWF, WCW and ECW heavyweight champtionships all at the same time and also the first woman/clown to kill an opponent with silly string and party poppers. This silly string and party popper combination soon became doinks signature move, despite its deadly properties.
Unfortuantly Doinks sexual affairs became so notorious, she was forced to give up all 3 of her titles even after holding them for a record 73 years. The most potent of her sexual affairs was with "James "The Mullet" Mullerson (Full name James Mullety Mullets Mulleting Mullet They Are The Best Are Mullets Mullerson) Who fell in love with Doink after hearing her theme tune, "Englishman In New York" by Sting. The two are thought to of contracted all known sexual diseases and have infact invented 5 new ones. Thats what you get for repeatedly having bum sex in a rubbish dump.
[edit] External links
