Steve Constant
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The Steve Constant was discovered on Cinco de Mayo by some guy named Steve. It is significant for being the most useless constant in the history of the world, used mainly in the field of Stevathics, which is what Steve uses when he's bored in his math class and he starts writing down random numbers.
[edit] Representations
The Steve Constant is represented by the mathematical symbol:
Some people have mistaken the Steve Constant for the number 8. These people are ridiculous, and should be taken outside and shot. Or, y'know what? Screw taking them outside, just shoot 'em now. They deserve it for being as dumb as they are.
The formula for the Steve Constant is as follows:
as it is Steve's favorite number, and decided one drunken Saturday that it should be a constant. Steve claims that the constant is important because, in his words:
| Well, um...it, er...LOOK A HUGE DISTRACTING THING! |
I thought he was making it up, and was subsequently mauled by the large distracting bear right behind me.
[edit] After the discovery
After its discovery, it was found that the Steve Constant only comes out to be a whole number when it is brought to the power of 63. This was later found to be untrue, and it only appeared to be a whole number because the calculator being used rounded down, the bastard.
According to Steve, Stevathics is the math of Steve, only used by Steve, only useful to Steve, and only understood by Steve and the clinically insane. Steve claims that other species have different forms of mathematics far beyond he understanding of human beings. Steve had always been told by others that they wanted to learn these other maths. He invented Stevathics to give humanity a serious headache, and they would subsequently stop worrying about other forms of math and go drink whiskey straight from the bottle. Experts would agree that this explains a lot about people today, but these experts all have severe hangovers and are unavailable for comment.
[edit] Characteristics
The Steve Constant is in constant (LOL) conflict with the Matt Constant, defined as
The Matt Constant, however, has been proven to be stupid, like its inventor, who is not only stupid, but also fat.
Some controversy has risen due to the fact that constants and maths are usually invented by people in some far-off country with comical names (Heh heh, Planck). Many prominent math persons have said that just because some skinny teenager claims a number is a constant doesn’t mean it is of any real significance. These people have missed the entire point of the Steve Constant, which is that it is useless. For their insolence, these people have been taken outside and shot. Some of them already were outside. They were taken inside, punched in the face, then taken outside again and shot. Those who tried to confuse others by standing in the middle of a doorway were hit in the groin with an anti-vehicle sniper rifle. Fuckers.
