Sting ray

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“ Sting ray? More like sing gay! Hahaha! But seriously folks, they scare the shit out of me. ”

~ Oscar Wilde on Sting Rays

“Nah, don't worry mate, Sting Rays can't swim backwards. Just watch...”

~ Steve Irwin on Sting Rays

“I stop dead in my tracks, I look behind me and see something horrible baring upon me at a high rate of speed. I point as if to warn others, scream like a little girl and run away like the chicken shit pansy that I am.”

~ An Innocent Bystander on Sting Rays

[edit] A rather brief history of the Sting Ray

Sting-Rays, not to be confused with Stingrays or Ray Martin, are supersonic death machines, created by the renowned Sith Lord, Germaine Greer. Their initial purpose was to "Exterminate!!!!" the famous Australian crazy bastard, Steve Irwin.

Greer's motive for the creation of such a flat, pointy fish was not fully understood until the 4th of September, when head-honcho of the gang, Mr. Stingray finished the job and "Exterminated!!!!" the Crocodile Hunter.

Since that event, several stingrays have been taken into custody and Germaine Greer has gone into hiding, believed to be somewhere in London. However, this sudden retreat still hasn't managed to make the stupid bitch STFU. Scientists are marvelling at her ability to make shitty comments at a rate of 27,000 words per millisecond, and are currently trying to harness this energy to run the entire world's power supply.

[edit] Anatomy

Sting Rays are flat fish-like creatures. They glide along the ocean bed, looking for innocent Crocodile Hunters to capture and devour. At the rear end there is an Arsehole, as well as a Sting-Shaped-Thingy. This thingy also doubles as a powerful Ray-Gun, hence the name of the species, "STING-RAY".

The Ray-Gun is highly dangerous, and only highly-skilled professionals should handle it. Unless of course you have a death-wish, in which case, go ahead...

The beam emitted by the Sting Ray's Sting Ray is the only thing known to be able to penetrate Chuck Norris. This has only ever been attempted once... The Sting Ray is in a stable condition.

[edit] Natural Enemies (Apart from Vengeful Chuck Norrises)

The only known enemy of the Sting Ray is the Crocodile.it is said that the crocs a planing to ambush the sting rays just after ceeping a close eye on them at mating seson, thay are planning to eat them alive but are to scared to go enyware near them because of the giant stinging tail the are armed with