Stupid Americans
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“americans are so stupid that when one got locked in a toilet his bowel burst, and when one got locked in the supermarket he died of hunger”
~ British on Stupid americans
“Why does everyone hate us?”
~ Americans on The World
American citizens (from the USA) are naturally stupid. I hope this doesn't offend the few smart, nice Americans (still not found by scientists but believed to exist).
However, 1/60 Americans are ok. This is the same percentage of those that speak English decently or at all (sux including phrases don't count for English fluency).
Ameircans seem to have a natural fear of things that have not happened. They are like bunny rabbits minding their own business then as soon as something is heard! They are jumping and impatient, everything has to be done in that moment! When someone is a minute late they wanna scream bloody murderer.
If you put 3 average Americans together you get an IQ of 100 in the best case. Americans have a tendency to talk very fast. Often running whole sentences together in a matter of seconds. The aim is incomprehension, esp in cases when (some highly intelligent of them realise that "American citizens are naturally stupid" and try to hide it). On another note they say they have all the information they need which is bull. They barely know their own phone numbers. Another thing when you ask Americans for their address it is common for them to not give state and zip code. It is almost as if their zip code is a foreign object.
Many people in America don't even belong in America. They go there without known a word of English. It is common for them to not understand and force you to repeat about 6 times.
Also Americans seem to skip over fine print like it is not there. They seem to believe that everything is how its printed.
The most common stupid Americans are the rednecks from the southern states, and Jessica Simpson.
Rednecks, are strange and mindless creatures; A common tendency of a redneck is to use the question "Say what now?". This phrase/question telling you to say what, now is straining to the mind of most intelligent people. Telling another person to do so isn't asking that other person to repeat themselves or clarify, just to say "what". Why rednecks think this advances the conversation, is yet to be understood.
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[edit] The problems with America
Americans are also very hypocritical -- they all wanna lose weight and all that health crap. Yet more people than ever are eating fast food! Even as babies they shove it down their throats! Good job Americans just breed fat lazy pigs. And also they never take responsibility for their kids actions. It's always BLAME VIDEO GAMES! BLAME BAD TV SHOWS! Why don't you look at your yourselves. Drinking in front of your children and beating on their relatives. Like seriously.
"Now son respect your elders." says a Father.
"Then why are you pounding on grandpa?" The son cries.
"Cause he wants to spend our inheritance money!" Father pounds on grandpa.
"You damn ungrateful son I should have pushed your mother down the stairs when I had the chance!" Grandpa screams.
[edit] Educashun Programs
In order to combat the poor educashun of many Americans upon leaving college, the US Government regularly declares war on some unsuspecting country in a remote part of the world, in order to teach a whole generation some geography.
[edit] Random facts about Americans
Americans are known to steal puppies. They often steal puppies to suck their sweet blood so they can continue playing online games. They often suck the blood by cutting open the back of the puppy but some like to cut up the gut but the stomach acid burns the lips.
Americans are also enslaved easily. You just need to offer them free stuff and they will follow you without hesitation. If they resist offer them food, p0rn, or power. Then put them in your sock drawer and make them do your homework/work.
Americans hold contests to determine particularly gifted individuals, such as this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj3iNxZ8Dww
[edit] American Sexuality
Americans have a tendency to enjoy the casual fun of Transformers pornography. One of the most famous lines is "I didn't know that output could be an input!" -Decepticons. This fascination with Transformers starts at an early age, especially in males, tomboys and lesbians. Children are often given Transformer toys to play with, which helps develop their love for Transformer porn and cars.
Other common form of sexual enjoyment among Americans include, but not limited to kitten on kitten porn (generally associated with too much kitten huffing, and male giraffe riding.
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