Sumo

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Ew...

~ Oscar Wilde on Sumo
For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Sumo.


I mean, look! Over in Japan, people actually take obese men fighting in nappies seriously!
I mean, look! Over in Japan, people actually take obese men fighting in nappies seriously!

Sumo wrestling is the ancient Japanese art of two obese people wearing nothing but diapers fight to knock each other out of a ring. While many Westerners think it is strange, the Japanese seem to find it most enjoyable.

Contents

[edit] Origins

The Origins of Sumo are much disputed. Some argue that it started out as a way of helping obese people to burn off their blubber, and that the diapers originated from the fact that matches used to go on for much longer than they do now. Others say that the origins are much more sinister, and that it was originally a way for the Japanese to indulge their underlying fat/diaper fetishes. There are many theories, but none have proved satisfactory. The name "sumo", however, comes from the two days of the week, Sunday and Monday, because they only ever wrestle on Sundays and Mondays. In no way is the sumo a form of Samurai (or their infants, the Sumorai), despite the common myth that the word comes from Samurai or Sumorai. Sumo therefore is not a Sumorai on a diet (hence the name having no "rai" - japanese for Rye).

[edit] Winning a Sumo bout

The rules are very simple. Basically, the two obese people in their oversized diapers try to either:

a) Push the other person out of the ring
or
b) Force the other person to touch the ground with a part of his/her body that isn't his/her feet, preferably his balls, which are kept in the nappie area as a good luck charm from their family and friends.This is also a good tactic to win the game as it helps you gain more points.

When this is done, the winner does a silly dance and the next bout begins.

[edit] Life as a Wrestler

Wrestlers (called rikishi) generally live in communes, kinda like hippies, but fatter. Many so-called experts often say how tough life as a wrestler is, but this is actually untrue. Many of these so-called experts have never actually been to a rikishi commune before. It is actually true that the communes are places where rikishi indulge their fetishes. They are the Japanese equivalent of BDSM dungeons

Kid1.gif a sumo fighter looking at porn on the internet


[edit] Kinds Of Sumo

Image:Fat cat 4.jpg


Sumat These sumo are more skillful than all sumo(that is unless it is against a sdugo) It has amazing speed an abillity to ascappe from a sumo's flab.


Image:RealMario.jpg


Marumo This sumo became extinct after one year.The cause:Princess peach put Mrumo on the Weight Watchers program.


Image:Fattystats.JPG


Litle missumo The worse sumo ever born. This little girl eat French Fries on stage! "Sorry your to skinny to be a sumo,ya big !@#$%"they said.

[edit] See also

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