Swear words
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This page is extremely offensive and should not be viewed by anyone.
It may be illegal in several countries as well.
| If you are not offended by it, please edit it so that you will be in the future. For an example of how to be offensive, see: Dead Politicians Club |
ASSHOLES MAKE THESE PAGES Swear words are words or phrases that make baby Jesus cry. The use of swear words are known to cause:
JESUS, YOU GUYS ARE LAME. YOU NEED TO BE MORE OFFENSIVE, PL0X.
penis enlargement, gay urges, ADHD, cancer, megalomania, evil, wanting to sing along to Britney Spears, grammar bad, repetition, spazism, rickets, repetition, mongoloidism, anal contractions, indigestion, cuboidism, the inibity two spel, gimboidism, an urge to kill all the Jews, the ability to fly upside-down, Alzheimer's, the plague, the hatred of light, wonky walking, satanism, horse-lovin, vampirism, chickenpox, catholicism, spontaneous masturbation, racism, whatever the hell is wrong with Stephen Hawking, sexism,EXCESSIVE LOLLING, the love of techno music, Nazism, paedophilia, contradictory-ness, paedophobia, supernumerical testicles, hypothermia, vin Diesel-ism, floppy ball-sack syndrome, leprosy, heterosexuality, schizophrenia, blindness, scrotal bleeding, the love of long lists, twatism, cirrhosis of the liver, alcoholism, colour blindness, dental plaque, cystic fibrosis, bad-ass driving skills, the illusion of space, time travel, sexual magnetism, actual magnetism, cool martial arts abilities, the love of wotsits, diahorrea, dementia, earthquakes, domestic violence, gastrointestinal haemorrhaging, unemployment, lesbianism, kitten huffing, poor job prospects, baldness, the worst disease you can think of - yeah that one, penal hypersensitivity, sleepiness, pulmonary anthrax, spontaneous combustion, pre-planned combustion, meningitis, the inability to divide, oral skills - you know what I mean, poly-penis disease, the gift of lying convincingly, polio, rastafarianism, rape, rectal disfunction, alliteration, Mourinho to be a complete twat, limbal spasms, vertigo, gonorrhea, and SPARTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Contents |
[edit] How to Swear
You can't - so piss off. BUGGER
[edit] Yeah, you want some do ya...?
The proper answer to this question is "why don't you go bum-fuck your own mum, you cockass horse-wanking spaz-fuck".
hey guess what................i suck cock. anybody have some fo' meh?
[edit] HAIL HITLER
DO IT, BITCHES.
[edit] History
Swearing was invented by that guy over there - quickly, go beat him up before he has time to explain himself.
[edit] Immediate Future
Blurry in a hail of kicking and profanities
[edit] Future
The future holds many babies and small rodents butt-fucking each other until they blow up from inhaling shit-semen of the third degree. Sure, the next George Bush may try and stop the butt-fucking and shit-semen inhalation by banning it from cities and states, but there will always be fucktarded teenagers who read this shit and continue to use the swear words that make up many teen's vernacular. If you are reading this now, say "tuff nuts mister fuck fuck,CUZ I LIKE CORN IN THE SHITHOUSE, MOMMIE DONT FUCK THE FROG" and then go rape your dog just to prove you are the cobra commander of this out-fucking-fit. Show your parents just how much you love porn, and swearing will continue to be a part of our lives each and every day of your pathetic fucking existance.
[edit] Distant Future
Bleak. Chance of fucking rain: Real fucking High. Time until first anal rapage: 12 seconds.... FUCK!
[edit] Why you shouldn't swear
Why are you asking me this!? Do you think I'm god or something?
[edit] why you should not swear
If you swear a sea gull will get ya! And rape your fucking ears inside out until the lobsters stop masterbaiting to the spinal fluid of space cow!
[edit] List of Swear words and Phrases
The art of swearing - and yes, it is an art, bitch - is a forgotten skill, one whose path you must follow carefully as it meanders between unemployment and imprisonment. In order for you to master the skills of the uncouth, you must master the following phrases, one of which must be spoken in each and every sentence you use - except for the prime ones.
N.B. The following is a proper list of swear words, not those pussy swears found in other lists.
- Fuck, cock, bitch, wank, asshole, donk, cunt, twat, moron, gimboid, bimbo, shlong, dipshit, bitch tit, asshole fucking shit raper, spaz, your mom, dickhead, bollocks, bastard, penile-ass-wank, spazomotron, mongoloid, monkey-fuck, gimboloidal-cock-wank, a-hole, ball-bag, anal-cock-bandit, bumhole, fuck-wank, Cock-Munch, humanoid-pussy-wank, fuckhole, fuckface, knobface, piss-flap, shit-head, tossertron, ass-tard, homo-butt-munch, cock-knob, felching-face-fuck, fuckaloid, anal fucker, fuckass, fucktard, fucknut, tit-wanking-goit-bag, muther-fucking-hyper-anal-cock-bag, scrotal-ass-wank, fuck-bag, <insert name here> and cock-sucking-twat-hole, tbag the wanka, darvill fagit gay, bean head tosser nob, fuck face copper nob with piss on your top cock, your name is matthew darvill, darvill dickwat, cheesy bell cock face end of the untited end head, nob up your fanny a hole, u smelly shit gay wanka u r darvill, cock tard, willy warmer nob, democrat, Communist, Juan, Rahim, Uru-kai, donkey raping shit eater, carpet muncher(lezzo), uncle fucker, pig fucker, knob jockey, llama fucker, male milk drinker, slack fannied bastard, shit neck, Quiggers the Queer Bear, do you want some chips, fuck them chips, 2 Minute Noodles, Rabbit, Snot, Bum, Nipple, Komodo lover, teddy bear.
it must be appreciated that swear words are linear: if we have two swear words, any linear combination of the two is also a swear word.
- E.g., cock and fuck can be combined to make cock-fuck - a perfectly good swear word.
Swear words also also corruptive - they corrupt seemingly ordinary words.
- E.g., table - a perfectly normal unoffensive word. However, combined with with the swear words fuck, bitch, cock, wank, twat, etc. it can be transformed into the offensive phrases table-fuck, cock-table, cock-sucking-table-fuck, etc.
Now, armed with this knowledge go forth; fly my pretties, FLY!
[edit] See Also
donkey raping shit eater, uncle fucker, pig fucker, you cock wanking father fucker
