Sword Naming

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The first sword in history dates back prior to the origin of primates and its outer skin had a reptilian scaley appearance. over thousands of years, it evolved into features with birdlike properties. These sword primates dominated the skies and hunted their prey with stealth qualities, flying high in the sky, and 'dive bombing' their prey with a deadly 'stab'. Primative swords never aimed to kill twice; their first lunge at their dinner was all that needed. As time progressed, due to swords eating profusely, there was little need to stab for their food. Ever since the start of humankind, swords manipulated their way with humans as it was a free feed. Though since then, people have been trying to figure out unique names for these things. Humans didn’t have this problem with the first sword, simply naming it 'sword' was appropriate (although it did gain several titles later). although swords never starved with people, history provides evidence of the cruelty that swords have endured, both physically, and emotionally, through their inadequate aquisition of their titles. Due to copyright infringment in the early day of the sword's evolution, there were problems in the aquistion of their names. After thousands of countless unnamed and poorly named swords, guidelines were created for what to call them, that were governed by the 'United Nations' committee due to the sensitivity of these exquisate forms that bequest Earth.
Photographic evidence of sword cruelty.
Photographic evidence of sword cruelty.
Medieval Artist's depiction of a prehistoric sword
Medieval Artist's depiction of a prehistoric sword


Contents

[edit] Part one: Ascertaining the appearance of the sword

An easy phase in naming, a simple technique is to look at the sword and decide what type it is. Typically a sword presents as a handpiece at one end and the other end the metal pointy bit. if the sword is a newborn,or a young child than, the large feathers that are on the metal part need to remain until the sword maults. if the infantile's sword feathers are plucked from them prematurely, then the sword's metal integrity is impaired, causing 'chinks' in the sword. It takes either a true idiot or a dumbass to mess this up as the swords type should be obvious whether embedded with down feathers or not. Once the sword has been catagorised, with the elements discussed below, and with factors depending on the style of the sword, some swords can actually skip the catagorisation entirely if they are either too generic or too cool to require one.

[edit] Common meta (first)labels of swords and their titles

  • Words symbolizing fire or heat
  • Words symbolizing ice or cold
  • And so on for other enchantments
  • "Dragon" or any species thereof
  • Other, less dragonish creatures that don't deserve to be listed here
  • Words that symbolize sharpness, like blade or edge
  • What it does
  • What style of sword it is


[edit] Part two: The first name

Either a random series of letters that sounds like a plausible word or a suppliment of the meta name. Often used to remedy a generic name. Famous failures in this phase include Inferblade, the Ice Sword, a famous Ice based sword.


[edit] Part three: Extraneous title

Kind of like the sword's middle name. This either is tacked on at the end to add additional value to the sword in question or used in place of an actual name.

[edit] Examples

  • {Sword} the {meta name}, instrument of justice
  • {Sword}, the bloody
  • {Sword}, bringer of stabbings
  • The mysterious sword of legend
  • {Sword}, the pwnzor {first name}

[edit] Real Names

Excalibur as an infant with his siblings
Excalibur as an infant with his siblings
Whole names are names of swords that are just one word or a series of words that name the sword as a whole, an example could be excalaber or (enter name of your sword here). Whole names are usually used for swords that are Famous, or owned by people that like to talk to inanamate objects, unless the sword can talk and has named itself such as Lula from Dave the Barbarian. Or Mr. Rimblade from Caelestia. Swords, like humans can suffer at the mercy of their parents, who can burden them with horrific names. Memorable names of swords include "Alfonso", Fifi Trixibelle, Peaches Honeyblossom Michelle Charlotte Angel Vanessa, and Pixie. The latter of these names, inspired by the Geldof and Yates children, have an affinity for tacky celebrity and hard drugs.

It must be warned that naming your sword after crappy celebrities may result in your sword emulating them in try-hard fancy.. Don't say I didn't warn you!

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